‘Boring’ Can Be Beautiful!

For most clients, my coaching is to make their lives more exciting.

But for some of you, the best coaching is: be MORE boring.

Are you someone who likes drama? Distraction? Are you (fishily) wrapped up in disputes such that your dreams appear justifiably on hold? Hmmm… smell the rat. Or are you distracted by fun things like work, play, friends, parties, gift giving, addictions? Either way, a return to simplicity might be just what this new year ordered.

A dear client, Malea, in wrapping up a five month stint of coaching, wrote this to us:

By focusing my attention on myself, it freed up time/energy to knock down some simple tasks in my environment. I stopped running away from my basic needs and responsibilities within my life. The process wasn’t easy at all. I had to go through an uncomfortable time, sitting still and being present to the desire to run to the “fun and exciting” activities in my life. I have eliminated the bad theory that “Routine is boring, unimaginative and dull. Staying spontaneous and impulsive is more exciting and leads to independence.” The more I followed through on my tasks at home (i.e. water the plants, walk, trim the roses, wash windows, cook dinners, plan my week, etc.) the more I felt nourished and taken care of by myself. I now feel extremely content, full of pride and pleasure while working through these basic needs. The more I focus on the critical basic needs, the more I feel love for myself. I am reminded of this shift in my life every time I look at a maidenhair fern in my house. It has been alive for 5+ months! It symbolizes my new ability to nourish myself and the important people (or living things) in my life.  

This was a great reminder to me of the very simple things we often forsake. It shocks me sometimes when I meet a new group of clients and find out some of the things they forgo:

– regular sleep
– intake of real quantities of water
– regular exercise that increases heart rate
– regular exercise that increases flexibility and strength
– spiritual practice
– regular time with and loving actions toward close family and relationships
– balancing checkbook, keeping a budget, managing taxes
– if building a business, making contacts with people who can help
– if single, going on dates
– getting outside
– cleaning up
– making order in the house

I am begging you right now to consider ending your year with an eye towards being a little more boring. When we say “end your year with a bang” we don’t mean it has to be glitz, glamor and “force” based. We mean learning to come home to your true ideals and take actions consistent with them. This always feels great, I promise. But you really won’t know this until you let go of the ego’s desire for excitement and practice it.

Tell me, what of the above list will you take on in the new year, for real, as a lifestyle change? And please, come back after you’ve tested it for at least two weeks before you vote which lifestyle you like better. Remember: “boring” can be beautiful!!



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Laurie Gerber is President of Handel Group® Life Coaching, an international coaching company, which specializes in teaching individuals to take focused and powerful action in every area of their lives. You can connect with Laurie on Facebook at HG Life Coaching.

  • Jodiclara

    I like this!

  • Mayralou

    This just what I needed. Thank you and many blessings. <3

  • Rosanna

    I am a recovering drama queen.  For years, I chased after unproductive but exciting relationships.  It took me a long time to realize the pattern of avoiding the boring, but very important work by chasing after the exhilarating high of getting an uninterested person to like me or give me attention.
    I now call that “dragon riding.”  Eventually I realized that working on my business could be just as exciting as dragon riding, but since it was unfamiliar I continued to choose the known dragons because I had a script for them. Now I ride the dragon of my business and find it to be even MORE fun than the old unproductive habit.
    I can’t say I don’t still get attracted to these types from time to time.  But when I do, I catch myself and make a turn in the other direction saying: “Some puzzles are best left in the box.”

    • Renpic

      Wow, ‘dragon riding’, I love that phrase! I’ve had plenty of experiences with it.  I hope that the business dragon is gentler to you, and/or more fun! 🙂  

  • SueB

    Is dating a necessity?  I love my space and my alone time, and have many very creative hobbies that give me a sense of purpose and expression.  I am not interested in taking away from this fun time to put time into a relationship.  I do, however, agree that I should take time to balance my checkbook.

  • d Mpshe

    I’ve recently started looking after my home n doing all the things I didn’t like doing in the past.Boring can really be beautiful:-)

  • Sofie Karlstrom

    Spot on! LOVE this post. I am going through the same process. Having been lousy on routines my whole life, and uninterested in these basic things like cooking, cleaning, washing laundry, grocery shopping and so on… having just seen them as time thieves… six months ago a met a new boyfriend, who was as lousy as me. And we decided to do something about it. So now we have written down a weekly routine, and we take pride in taking care of ourselves. I stay at home more, and I feel a lot more taken care of. It’s beutiful! Love, Sofie

  • I am constantly on the lookout for something new and exciting and sometimes I forget how to be calm. I needed to read this this morning!