I don’t believe in wailing to the world that my life has just fallen apart, but things haven’t exactly been moving the way I want them to in ANY area of my life (except maybe physical health). Relationships, career, family support… are all facing turmoil. My intuition is fogged, I’m unable to follow my gut… because IT’S ALWAYS TIED UP IN A KNOT THESE DAYS. I can’t BEAR to watch/read a single negative word – it’s like I’ve got some compulsive disorder. I run from the most ordinary things. I’m disappointed with the way things have turned out for me…I used to be the most cheerful, happy-go-lucky person. I’ve loved without restraint, only to be badly hurt. Now I’ve just shriveled up into a fearful ball trying to figure out what went wrong, how I can change myself so patterns don’t repeat, trying to tell myself I’m enough and I deserve love from an amazing partner… I doubt myself and EVERYTHING else at times. Why did all my love, effort and faith fall to nothing? I can’t live like this anymore. I’m so hurt; I wake up at nights feeling like I’ve been punched in the stomach. I believe in success, in love, in happiness. I want to be all that I can be. I need help. I need guidance.
A TDL Reader