Mastin interviews Gabby Bernstein about how she turned rock bottom into her life's purpose! → Check it out!

Daily Share – How Can I Find Happiness Within Myself?

TDL_FB iconHappiness: What does it mean & how does it feel to be happy within yourself?

I’ve been on my spiritual journey for the past three years & Mastin’s articles have been of great help. At times I feel like his articles are talking to me about something I’m struggling with. For me this is a sure sign the Uni-verse has my back. I’m very grateful for The Daily Love :)

Currently I’m at a spiritual block & hopefully you can help me. I’m feeling a sense of void within my heart & I’ve narrowed it down to not feeling happy within myself without external factors. A lot of things have gotten really good in my life so I should feel happy but I don’t & I try to create happiness from external factors. On weekends I’ll plan meals sometimes unhealthy (I know it’s not good but it makes me happy) or I get really happy when my favorite TV show is on. External based happiness doesn’t last long. At times I feel like I’ll be so happy when I finish my Bachelor’s degree or when I reach my fitness goal. Planning my happiness on food is unhealthy but planning my happiness upon an accomplishment like a college degree is positive. They are both external & not internal. I’m totally stuck on this one & I’m searching hard to feel lasting happiness within myself. Hopefully you can shine some light on what it feels like to be happy from within or how to be happy within.

A TDL Reader

  • D26

    I am so much like this TDL reader.  Why do I depend on so many external things to make me happy?  I have no major financial problems, disease, illness, addiction or horrible tragedy that would cause me grief, and yet I am not happy. Being unhappy is a complete waste of time.   

    Today, I have started My Happiness Journey.  I know–it’s not that original of a title, but I need to start down this path immediately, and stop wasting time being unhappy. I will collect quotes, thoughts and stories that motivate me.  I will devote more time to prayer and reflect on my spirituality. Most importantly, and perhaps most difficult for me, I will focus on loving myself and practice feeling good. Everythng should fall right into place once I master this.

    In the finale of  the musical Les Miserables, the last line of this song gives the ultimate meaning of love:

    FANTINE, VALJEAN AND EPONINE:
    Take my hand
    And lead me to salvation
    Take my love
    For love is everlasting
    And remember
    The truth that once was spoken:
    To love another person is to see the face of god  

    Look it up online and hear it sung in person–it is very powerful and moving. 
    Will you join me on this journey?
    Good Luck!   

  • Meredith Henry

    Do you feel like you deserve happiness? Do you deserve love? What if you looked at your reflection in the mirror every morning and told yourself, “I have happiness and love within me regardless of what happens to me.” Would your internal voice say, “no you don’t you did X, so you don’t deserve it.” Would you believe it?

    What if you were told that your value wasn’t based on what you did, but rather of who you ARE. You and I are spirit. Your spirit is having a human experience. Our bodies are simply vessels that we are using to experience life in human form. You have the power to feel love and happiness as well. It is already in you. Sometimes we forget that, so our lives take us through different travels to remind us how to love others and to love ourselves regardless of what is going on. Start telling yourself that. Everyday. Several times a day. Every hour! It doesn’t matter if you don’t feel it at first. You have been trained for so long to believe that it comes from external things-so it might take a while to shut that voice up! : ) Eventually it will calm down and you will find it. I promise! 

    Sending you much love on your journey. 

    Meredith

  • cute_batet

    I always hear and know that happiness is found within ourselves.  Just like you, I’ve been searching and continuing to learn on the true meaning of having the happiness within.

    First of all, acknowledging your true feelings (knowing that you should be happy even when you’re not) is a good first step to take on your spiritual journey.  Denying your true feelings would just make matters worse.  Just like experiencing the feeling of pain, hurt or anger, we must not resist these feelings but rather acknowledge them and let go.  Otherwise, we might end up hurting somebody else as well as ourselves.  

    I totally agree with you that external happiness really doesn’t last that long.  Planning for the future and having dreams are essential for every human being so that we won’t be walking around this earth with uncertainty.  But most important of all is being in the present of moment and to focus on the NOW.  Being happy within is not when the things we want to happen is finally taking place right before our eyes but it is being happy where we are RIGHT NOW and what we are doing RIGHT NOW.  I’ve learned from other TDL readers that Eckhart Tolle’s, “The Power Of Now” is such an inspiring and a must-read book and it might help you get some wonderful insights.  I also suggest on keeping a gratitude journal.  I started mine this year and it’s been great.  Everyday I write at least 5 things that I am thankful for.  There are days when I find it hard to appreciate something that took place for the entire day especially when I feel so down.  But ever since I made it a habit, I always try hard to recall the events that happened until I get my 5 list done.

    Hope this helps you in some way.  I pray more happiness and blessings to come your way.  :O)  

  • http://twitter.com/EricaMcStay1 Erica McStay

    Hello fellow TDL reader!  Boy oh boy do I wish I had some magic answers that would solve your problem like *that*! 

    But, I’m no enlightened guru.  I’m just traveling the path.  

    But I’ve got to tell you, right now I’m a pretty happy chick.  But at multiple points during my life, I’ve felt like such a loser because I didn’t look like _____ or didn’t have _____.  I’ve beaten myself up over my weight and then gone and eaten a whole pizza by myself.  Then there’s the shame.  And man, there ain’t nothing like shame to wear your soul out. One big thing I’ve been hung up on in the past is that I didn’t want to finish college.  I love learning and I’m one smart cookie with a lot of passion and drive, but college isn’t for me.  STAYING in college was making me miserable.  Getting out of college and pouring my heart and soul into what I’m passionate about?  Well, that inspired the bejeezus out of me and made my heart swell.Of course, I’m not telling you to quit your degree program.  If you have a vision and feel like you are on a path to making that vision a reality – keep running towards that goal! Gallop, if you will!  It sounds like you understand intellectually what I’m about to say, but our rational mind is not the tool to use when trying to find fulfillment from within. When you reach your goal weight, the scale will not read back “HAPPY” to you.  When you walk across that stage and they hand you the diploma, “HAPPY” will not be written in big, bright lettering. There’s no magic wand, no quote, no person, no job or salary or house or dream body that means you have arrived at your final destination.  Until we can realize that who we are, in this moment is WHOLENESS and LOVE …. then we’ll always have something to bitch about. Once you lose the 15 pounds, you’ll realize your arms aren’t as toned as you’d like them to be.  When you buy the big house, you’ll settle into it and it will become your new normal and before you know it, you’ll be wanting something bigger and better.  I’ve been on a self-love, fulfillment journey for awhile now … pretty much ever since I realized that HAPPINESS has to be my priority or I’m just flat miserable and a drag to be around. I still have hard days or sad moments.  Sometimes I want to blow stuff off and indulge in sweets and television.  But those days are becoming scarce.  

    Here are a few things I do daily to keep me motivated and happy:

    I talk to myself.  Oh you betchya!  When I’m about to go in for that second slice of birthday cake I’m like “Hold up, sister.  You don’t even want that. You love yourself! You don’t want to sabotage yourself.”  Same for when I want to procrastinate work.  Something about saying out loud makes me feel not alone.  It really reinforces the idea of being your own BFF.  So, become your biggest cheerleader! It’s actually reallly fun to be your own best friend.  

    When you wake up in the morning, read TDL! But before you even get out of bed, open your eyes, then close them again and tell yourself that you are loved. You are whole. You are powerful. You ARE love. Put your hand on your heart or wrist and feel your heart beat while you do this.  Think of what a brilliant machine your body is.  It’s your vessel to navigate this beautiful life!  If you can learn to appreciate your body for how hard it works to keep YOU alive, you’ll want to treat it with the utmost respect. 

    Dance.  Seriously, just do it.  Everyone likes to boogie!  I dance when I’m making tea, or while my smoothie is blending.  I recommend singing loudly during this time as well.  Life should be fun.  It’s our responsibility to see to it that it is.  

    This one is SO huge.  Write a love letter to yourself.  Hang it up.  Read it. Add to it later. Memorize a few lines that really resonate with you and use them as mantras.  Here’s a few examples from my love letter to myself:  “I am so proud of you because you have begun the important task of taking responsibility for your life.”  “You have a vast arsenal of talents – share them with the world every chance you get!” “Don’t fear your greatness.  It is with you at all times and in each moment, you have the power to alter your destiny.”  “You are exactly where you need to be to get where you want to go.”  

    Talk to yourself in the mirror.  Promise yourself to take good care of yourself.  Tell you that you love you and thank yourself for doing the very best you can.  

    Buddha said “There is no WAY to happiness.  Happiness is the way.”

    So just be happy. Right now! Smile. Take a deep breath. Give yourself a hug. Call a friend. Sit in silence. Go for a walk. Don’t search too hard.  It’s right under your nose :)

    Lots and lots of love,

    Erica

    • Llesniko

      Right On Sister girl!!
      Erica… Thank you for reminding me of how beautiful
      I am.. We/Me are amazing and the most
      loving , beautiful creation of love!

    • Sherry

      Erica,
      I don’t know you but love you!  That was the most beautiful, humbling words of encouragement and wisdom to share with us all!  Thank you for that!  My soul was touched!

    • Katherine

      Oh my goodness you are amazing, I loved reading what you wrote, I felt your energy, excitement and love coming out of the screen, I am smiling and feeling little butterflies in my stomach. I do so many of your helpful hints and with no reason than just because, and it makes me smile. I am so sure that everyone reading your comment is happier and a little wiser on some great ways to love themselves and laugh out loud, even if no one is around. Thank you so much and may you have a blissful day.
             Love to you,
                  Katherine

    • Tessa Zabriskie

       Erica,

      Wow! Thank you so much for that. I printed it out so when i’m feeling anything less than amazing I can read that again to remind myself how awesome everything is and to show myself some love! Can’t wait to share this with my friends.

      Thanks again.

      Have a beautiful day!

      With Love,
      Tessa

    • http://www.facebook.com/tbow822 Tiffany Bowen

      This response was phenomenal, Erica! You made me want to jump out of my chair and start taking on the world! Thanks for the inspiring words. I can feel the Love from all the way over here.

      Thanks for your insight.
      Tiffany

    • http://beyouliveyourdream.blogspot.com/ Sarah Noel

      Erica,
      Wow!  Your response certainly hit home to several of us!  (And I’m guessing loads more who didn’t comment).  You gave such wise and inspirational advice!  I love the talking to you part.  I do that, in my head, but lately the voice has been more of leading me where I DON’T want to go (as in “That cupcake looks SO good, you deserve it, it’s ok, go ahead, eat it.”) and I need to shift it to where I DO want to go — being healthy and not eating or doing stuff that I know isn’t good for me.  :) 

      I also love some of your quotes from the letter to yourself. 
      “Don’t fear your greatness. It is with you at all times and in each moment, you have the power to alter your destiny.”
      “You are exactly where you need to be to get where you want to go.” 
      My favorites.  :)  I may use them myself, if you don’t mind. 

      Wow.  I’ll say it again. 
      I consider myself a happy person, but I feel happier just having read your post!  :)
      Thanks so much for the detailed and helpful comments in love!  :)

      Sarah
      http://beyouliveyourdream.blogspot.com/2013/03/break-open.html

    • :) lookpositive

      I am just speechless! 
      At the moment my eyes are watery and I so want to hug you. Thank you!
      Felt as if you are right in front and waking me up..pushing me to go forward and guiding me :).  I have adopted ‘Happiness path’ since quite sometime. Right now spreading it around is my mission :)

      heaps of love
      Meera

    • Theresa

      How did you know I needed to UNDERSTAND what you shared?  Seeing is believing for me.  Written phrases that I can dwell on, for as long as I need to, help me sort out my emotional attachment to OTHERS.   When I dwell on inspirational messages like yours, I see “HOW I AM” in relationship to a “kindred spirit” that I want to achieve.    My new focus in life is to SHOW/TELL/MAKE people that I Love “know” that THEY ARE VALUABLE TO ME.   I want them to know that my HAPPINESS  is the GIFT THEY PRESENTED TO ME.  When I look in the mirror, I “RECOGNIZE” my “self” immediately.  I see the present physical condition of  one of the BLESSINGS  that God sent to my mother.   I RECOGNIZE a personal history of  BEING FULLY LOVED.   The Love I FEEL  puts a JOYFUL expression on my face.    I want the people I love to see a “Joyful” expression when they look in a mirror.

    • http://www.facebook.com/prasad.surapaneni Prasad Surapaneni

      Hi, I try my best to help out people too. Have written a blog on happiness , please have a read and comment 

      http://www.empowernetwork.com/mewnew11/blog/what-is-happiness-how-can-one-be-happy/?id=mewnew11

    • Sam

      Thank you Erica for your inspirational words “Don’t fear your greatness. It is with you at all times and in each moment, you have the power to alter your destiny” and “You are exactly where you need to be to get where you want to go.” :)

  • http://www.embracetheinneryou.com/ Embracetheinneryou

    Try spending time reflecting on what brings you joy. What are you doing when you are truly happy? Do those things more often. It could be drawing, dancing, creating something, hiking, singing, writing, whatever. But when you do those things, notice how happy you are feeling. Happiness is who you really are.  The true you will shine through. Also, be sure to talk kindly to yourself about yourself. Being critical of yourself is hurtful. Self-talk is powerful, so if you catch yourself saying unkind things about yourself, just stop it right there and choose a kinder thing to say about  yourself. When you really love yourself, you will find true happiness from within.
    Also, being grateful is another way to become happier. Look at all that you are fortunate for in your life, and be grateful for those things. Each of us has come into the world with a gift. It would be helpful for you to connect with your gift. When you are doing what comes naturally to you and brings you joy, that is most likely your gift/your purpose.
    I hope this has been helpful to you.
    Enjoy who you are!

  • tedge

    Congratulations on the beautiful awareness, awareness is were growth happens. Start meditating it will bring you to your internal joy, love and peace your looking for.  

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000742777032 Jennifer Richards Rinehart

    When I help others, I learn lessons in humility and understand that it’s not all about me. Making the most of the best and the least of the worst. Trusting in the process believing in the progress! Today I choose to enjoy my journey, for it is MY choices, not circumstances that determine my success in every area of my life. The bigger question is..what kind of mind do I want to make those choices with? full of fear, instant gratification, emotional racing thinking? Or a mind filled with spirit, serenity and faith, to make my choices with? My mind has been changed through the grace of my Higher Power or Higher Self through my willingness to stay in the moment, take my inventory, gratitude, help others, etc.All these actions and attitude are more for me than just staying clean, This is how I change from the “inside out”. Don’t block the blessings.