I’m honestly not sure where to begin with this so I suppose I’ll just go with it. I’m in my 20s and I’m desperately, painfully, single. I’ve been in a wheelchair most of my life because of my disability I was born with and I use it to get around. There’s been so many girls I’ve had crushes on over the years, but I’ve always been painfully shy around girls because I always think “She’d never go out with me” or “She’s too perfect to go out with me”- I’m having this thought process with two girls right now.
I always think I’ll never get a girlfriend, God forbid a wife, yet people are constantly saying, “Oh my God! HOW are you still single?!” Well, Einstein, if I knew the answer to that I’d have a girlfriend by now. I’ve always been the friend and NEVER anything more. EVER. And I know it’s because they look at me and silently wonder “Can he even have sex? What would I have to deal with if I go out with him?” and things like that. I don’t know what I can say or do to make a girl return the feelings I have for her. And before anyone suggests “dating sites” stop right there. I’ve tried them all. I make it a priority to show pics of me in my chair so I don’t deceive anyone upfront, and the only response I get is “How’d that happen?” and my personal favorite, “Are you paralyzed from the waist down?” The chair is a repellent. It’s all people see. If there was a way I could use a dating site where there were no pictures required or anything like that, it might help. But I’m so lost in this depression I think I’m hopeless.
To add to that, I can’t drive yet, so I don’t get to just go out and meet girls like a normal 24-year-old would. I never hang out with many friends except some close ones. If it weren’t for them I’d be a lot more depressed. The only way I’d talk to girls is through a casual, “Hey how are you text?” and not too much more. I know I’ll drive eventually, but right now I’m just being crushed under all of this loneliness and isolation. I feel like I’ve wasted the best years of my life by not being able to drive or get a girlfriend. I’ve thought of Craigslist, but I don’t know what would that would accomplish.
This is truly eating away at me and I’m at my wits end. Please help. Any advice is appreciated.
A TDL Reader