I am constantly looking for guidance and a way to slow my nomadic side down. Is it normal to constantly seek change or am I searching for what is missing inside? I struggle with this daily and have since I was 18 now 36. I want to be settled. Lay down some roots, but two places come to mind, but are not equal in what they offer.
I feel like I will be missing something important if I relocate to either. My major dilemma is my current residence is majorly depressing and in some ways I feel like I am at a stand still. I am not on my path. I am merely on the sideline waiting to get into the game. I know I want a new career and need to make at least 70k. Does money drive me? Now it does. I realize money is always a struggle and when I made more than I do now, I was happier. Knowing I can pay my bills and have money left over to travel, which fuels my passion and craving of new surroundings and save for a rainy day will absolutely make me happy. I know I want a job in recruiting, but seems hopeless at times to get back into this field.
I continue to go to therapy and grow emotionally so I can be healthy. I want a partner that helps me grow and does not need “help” in any way. I tend to attract this type. I guess I continue to question myself because most of my friends and family are happy or maybe just content in their current state. I wish I felt more like them. I feel like it will never happen with me. Being a gay woman in Phoenix isn’t helping. I see so much negativity and drama and less of a community than I have seen elsewhere. I am rambling I realize, but hope there are people out there besides me that feel this way even if it’s a small portion.
A TDL Reader