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Daily Share – Relationships Are Assignments!

For the past 4 months, I have been trying to let go of past relationships. I have been trying to remember the idea that relationships are assignments and when those assignments are done, we have to be willing and able to let them go so that we are able to receive our next assignment. When I learned this, I felt peace, but there are times when this feels much easier said than done. To let go of a friendship I have had for the past 7 or 8 years is difficult – to see that a group of three has gone to a group of two with me being the odd one out hurts. It hurts deeply. Sometimes I smile though, remembering the good times we shared, the lessons I’ve learned from them, and the attention and care that we showed each other when we were going through hard times. And at other times, I feel let down and I feel that at the time I needed them most, at my rock bottom before I started this journey of love, they abandoned me and wrote me off.

That pain might have led me to this journey of love, of course, so I cannot dismiss it. It’s enabled me to start this journey, really recognize my ego, and return to a place of love and peace. I can thank them for being part of my path, forgive them, forgive myself for the ways I might have hurt the relationship, forgive my ego, and release the relationship to the Universe. All I can think to do is to continue this process – forgiving and releasing. My question is this: does it get easier? Will it get easier when I see the “best friend” tweets and facebook posts showing up on my timeline between them, even when I quickly try to pass by them? Will it get easier when I see plans of trips being made for two when it used to be the three of us planning those things? Will it get easier when I see something that reminds me of them and I want to share it, but then I think about if they would even care? Will it get easier to accept being a casual acquaintance with contact here and there rather than the daily talks?

Does it get easier to release these assignments? When I was in school, when I finished an assignment, I immediately turned it into the teacher without a problem. I wouldn’t hold onto something that was already completed, nor can I now hold onto completed assignments that the Uni-verse has given me. How do I completely let go?

A TDL Reader

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  • <3

    Here’s the thing … All relationships we encounter become a part of us. I can relate to you. When I think of sending something I think if they wanted to reach out they would or maybe not. You can either send it with a “thinking of you” attached or not but don’t expect a return. You might be surprised. But until you’re sure maybe no contact is the best. Friendships have a way of feeling like a break up when it really means something to you. You can ask what happened to receive some closure and if you need to move on, do so. Just remember that every relationship is a two way street, so don’t shoulder all of the responsibility because the other two are still friends. Apologize for anything you feel you might done but don’t apologize for being yourself. It will get easier when you allow other people into your life and learn the lessons from this past assignment. Also, hide their posts or unfriend them if you need to. It’s not a popular thing to do but why should you be hurt? They’re not thinking of your feelings knowing that you’ll see those posts, so take care of yourself. Social media is how people are staying prisoner to relationships they need to let go of. Do what feels right for you. I hope this helps a little. You are enough as you are. Don’t make it about what you aren’t. Whatever it is they feel isn’t about you. Also, they might accept things about one another that aren’t in alignment with your values. Don’t take it personal. Big hugs and big love to you! Here’s to hoping you find new warriors along your journey!

    • Dailylovereader86

       I def agree with your point that social media is what reminds us of our pasts. Sometimes I delete my social networking apps for a week or so just so that I can escape the memories

  • Lindamac4545

    What I have found is that I must energetically disconnect from the other person’s field. Not in the sense that I no longer care for them, but more that I must care for myself first. Cutting cords is a big help (energetically) and I don’t see these so much as lessons, but rather as experiences. People come in and our of our lives, we serve them, they serve our needs. And when those needs are no longer of service, the experience is over. I do agree that you should disengage for awhile, more to just ground yourself and rediscover who you are and what your needs are at this time in your life. They have their experiences you have yours. I know because I am currently in the process of detaching from a 29 year marriage. The cords are deeply intertwined, and I am choosing to allow this to happen in grace and love rather than anger and fear. Keep cutting the cords, until you no longer have that emotional attachment to them, and you can then decide how or if you would like to have a relationship with them in a different form. But in the meantime, you have the exciting experience of allowing new people into your circle.
    I wish you all the best.  Big Hugs!!!

  • Vialpandotheresa

    I have been there, and yes it gets better. It allowed me to grow into my own, and to really find myself. It wasn’t easy I was hurt and confused at the time, but as I look back it was the best thing that could have happen, because it allowed me to grow. Doesn’t mean I don’t think of the wonderful times we had, its was just time for a new chapter in my life. When you let go you will see that there is a reason for all of this, I can promise you this. 

  • Dailylovereader86

    I too experience the same issue with letting go of past relationships that have come and gone. The memories will never leave your mind, and the pain may never leave your heart, but with time things will get better. I hope that you find new friends whom you can create new memories and great times with. In the meantime, I think you should remove them from your social network, just so that you aren’t constantly reminded of the friendship that once was. Hope this helps 

  • Karen

    Keep repeating to yourself, whenever needed, “I deserve to be happy.”  This is an amazing mantra that will attract positive energy, people and experiences.   I say it all day long so the Uni-verse will continue to give  me what I deserve.  It keeps me on track with feeling worthy of being happy – another big step for me.  

  • http://twitter.com/rebazoe Patricia Jeziorski

    I do have problems letting go, but when I look back and think spiritually and see what is in the present moment I do see that everything that happens is an assignment because if I look at where I am now, I wouldn’t be here at this assignment hadn’t it been for those that I already had.  Ego is such a big part of our lives and so unimportant in the scheme of things. I believe that loving ourselves first and learning that you can care about everyone but worrying doesn’t help a situation.   Forgiveness, I’m seeing is more a part of our Ego and practice, practice, practice Love and Forgiveness everyday.