I have an intense connection to the earth and animals. It’s so strong that when I read the book Eating Animals (which I would highly recommend to anyone wanting to know the truth about where your food comes from), each time the slaughtering of an animal was discussed, I would feel horrible pain in whatever part of my body the animal was. This connection usually results in my crying each time I see an animal dead on the side of the road, read a story or see a video about something horrible a human has done to an animal and on particularly bad days, I have been known to cry when I see a living animal by itself because I don’t want it to be lonely. As I type this, I am fully aware that it sounds incredibly crazy and to most people, ridiculous. I’ve tried to fight it. I’ve gone through periods where I wouldn’t allow myself to watch videos released by PETA or documentaries such as Earthlings, but then I felt even worse because I felt like I wasn’t doing my part in understanding what was truly being done to all those I love so deeply.
I’m sure by now; it goes without saying that I have felt more at ease around animals than I ever have around humans. I remember sitting by myself at lunch in elementary school listening to the other kids talk about things that I couldn’t relate to and just feeling like some kind of weird alien. I found solace in the connection I felt with animals. They listened without judgment, which helped me not judge myself so much. I could feel how in sync they were with the earth and I knew deep inside that if humans had the same connection, it wouldn’t be so easy for us to be so disrespectful to this amazing planet we are allowed to inhabit. I now realize looking back, my joy of being barefoot all the time was because it allowed me to feel the earth’s energy as most animals do every day. My passion for protecting them grew as I got older, as is my energetic connection to them. The feelings I described above didn’t start until I became totally vegan 6 years ago and it was about the same time that my anger towards humans for doing what they were doing every day to animals began. This anger has, at times blown up into rage and hatred, which really creates issues for me. Obviously, I’m human, so I know when I feel this anger towards humanity, my soul feels it too and it certainly isn’t healthy. Self-love and love for others, human or animal, is something I know to be incredibly important, which is why I am so grateful for The Daily Love, but I can’t seem to totally release the negative feelings I have. I know my calling in life is to do whatever I can to be the voice for those that can’t be heard. I want to do something magnificent, such as making a documentary and up until a year ago I was living in Los Angeles, which is the place to be to do that. For financial reasons, I had to move back to Ohio and at first really struggled because I thought I had lost the ability to make a difference, but I am now enjoying the small steps toward the bigger goal, whether it’s volunteering at local shelters or spending time with Hugo, my cat I found nearly starved to death on the street a few months ago. I guess I’m writing this because I need to know that I can learn to release the anger I have and also to know that it’s just as important to be of service to animals as it is to be of service to humans. I guess really it’s my ego needing validation that my soul’s purpose here is actually important, if that makes sense.
A TDL Reader