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For Those Days When You Just Don’t Feel Like It…

chrisassaadToday’s been one of those days that the writing just doesn’t seem to be flowing. I went to bed last night a little unsettled about an email I received from a close friend who I haven’t been clicking with lately, and I woke up with the feeling still there.

Determined to clear the way for a day of intended creating, I let it all out in my morning pages and then went into the ocean to wash it all away with a swim. I felt much lighter and much clearer after that, but there is still this part of me that wants to use the last little remaining hints of the upset as an excuse to skip the writing today, to not show up for my creativity and to take a day off from playing full out.

Luckily, I’ve been down that road enough times to know that it’s not leading anywhere I want to go. It would be easy to use some slippery circumstance or life situation to justify letting myself off the hook of doing what I’m committed to doing and being who I am committed to being. There’s a part of me that’s well versed in using my moments of weakness and vulnerability as an opportunity for indulgence in laziness, inaction, addictive tendencies and regression. That’s the real slippery slope.

We’ve all had the experience of being hurt, disappointed, conflicted or challenged and we all share the inner knowing that an ice cream, a drink, a smoke, a toke, a new car, a new dress, a new pair of shoes, a one night stand or another person are not going to solve the problem. What’s worse is that when we turn to outside sources instead of turning to our own gifts and ability to heal ourselves, we deepen the wound and we add the burdensome weight of unused creative energy and unfulfilled potential. This only intensifies the underlying pain of the inciting experience and the lie that goes with it, which is that we are not in control over how we feel.

The Truth: we are in control.

We have the ability to create our own perceptions and feelings about what happens in life, but we need to use our gifts and exercise our creative muscles to access this control. When we tune in to our inner yearning to express and show up at the page to write, it is easier to recognize ourselves as the author of our life story. When we heed the call to create and make our way to the blank canvas to paint, we connect with our ability to color our perceptions of life’s unfolding and to steer it in a way that matches the vision in our mind’s eye. When we use our voice to sing our heart song and let the music within us be heard, it becomes easier to speak up and express our truth in our lives and our relationships. When we look through the lens of the camera, we remember that we get to choose what we focus on and what perspective we will take to view life. When we push ourselves to get our butt to the gym and do those extra reps, we find the strength and courage to push through the challenges in life.

We are so blessed to be alive and to have the choice to use our bodies, our minds and our spirits however we like. When we recognize this freedom as a gift and connect to the particular forms of expression that light us up, we can begin to understand the truth of how powerful we really are and connect to our ability to create and shape our experience of being alive.

We can either let our circumstances define us or we can choose to use our gifts and define them. The empowered choice is to use the challenges, the upsets, and the conflicts to fuel our creative fire and to drive us to new heights. Especially on the days when we just don’t feel like it or it seems like we don’t have the goods.

Today, I came close to losing that battle, but the wisdom of previous experiences stayed with me enough to present a new choice. Instead of allowing myself to be swayed from the task at hand, I asserted my control and stayed on the creative course that I am committed to walking. I willed myself to the blank page to write something, anything, even if it was just to work out those last little emotional kinks and chinks in my armor from an upsetting situation.

I’m glad I did. I feel much better now.

Thanks for listening. I hope you do too :)

Much love,

Chris

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Chris Assaad is a singer/songwriter and inspirational artist from Toronto who left a promising career in law several years ago to pursue his dream of a career in music. Since then, Chris has been actively using his voice to enCOURAGE others to follow their dreams, express their creativity and live life to the fullest.

Connect with Chris via www.chrisassaad.comTwitter and Facebook.

Chris is also a member of the TDL Mentoring team. To learn more about the TDL Mentoring Program click here.

  • https://www.facebook.com/michelle.marie.733450?ref=tn_tnmn Michelle Crowley

    Hi Chris,
    I understand this very well this weekend. I’m enduing heartbreak. I teeter between the tears of the Ego and the peace of my Zen space. You are right when you say it’s a slippery slope. The Ego space of despair feels real. The Zen space feels like I’m fooling myself. The Zen path is new for me. Eventually, I hope, it will become the first place I ‘go’ when my heart breaks. Thanks for sharing! Your message came at the right time for me.
    Much love,
    michelle

  • Nora

    Thanks Chris, I needed this. Today is a day when I feel like I just can’t do it. I know exactly what I want to write and yet the words don’t come and it makes me crazy. It is the worst. And I wanted to stop for today, but after reading this I decided to finish what I started. So thank you.

    Much love as always! Nora

    • Chris Assaad

      Yes Nora! Keep going! Sometimes when the words don’t come out it’s because we’re putting so much pressure on ourselves to have it be a certain way or because we’re so close to finishing that we talk ourselves out of it. Give yourself permission to just write and trust that whatever comes through is perfect!

  • Carie Bean

    Darkness draws a shade over the heart
    Twists and disects and weighs its heavy hand over the joy that wants to be free
    Somewhere from very far away one hears the muffled crying.
    Do we dare to help that soul or refuse to help it shine? The strength you found to speak your truth spoke to all who see.

    Chris,
    Look at you! Swimming in the ocean! How nice. I suppose it warmed up a little since last time you spoke of it.
    Hope you and your friend find a way. Sending you heart shine!
    I too was having a moment that was holding me back and this helped me know that I should not let it consume me. Happy Day, Carie

    • Chris Assaad

      Carrie! Yes, the ocean got a little warmer and I’ve been loving the chance to go in and take a dip. Thanks for your warm wishes.

      And look at you weaving such beautiful words together with so much grace. Hope you got past your moment of stuckness too. Thankful for your inspired reflections. Your writing needs to be posted and shared!

  • Sara

    such a great start to my Sunday, thank you!

    • Chris Assaad

      Thanks for reading Sara! Glad to hear :)

  • Kelsey Campion

    I love your use of “intended creating”- being new to the creative field I often find myself thinking I should just be inspired all the time, and that things should naturally come. Thanks for reminding me that creation is intentional, and there are many roadblocks that get in the way. Awareness is key, and being honest with myself is a must. Thanks for sharing, what an inspirational post.

    Kelsey

  • Lile408

    Beautiful Chris ,
    I love how when reading your post,every different soul
    gets something the same but different… I took away today how my
    action of parenting has been an amazing lesson in showing up
    when many days, hours…. minutes I don’t want too.
    But I do and it strengthens me always!!
    And speaking of the ocean, I have always been drawn to the sea..
    It holds a wonderful metaphor of life to me…. Vast , strong , powerful,
    scary, beautiful . Many times I don’t want to get in it, but do because it
    is so healing for me.
    Thankyou for illuminating me today on that notion of the ocean .
    You are In Spirit ing me today as ever……

    Lile

    • Chris Assaad

      Thank you for this heartfelt message Lile. I have so much admiration for parents like you and for all you do to show up for your children.
      And I have always been drawn to the ocean too and yet, can also relate to not always wanting to get in it until I do and remember how healing it is. Hope you find yourself in the water soon. Your kids are blessed to have you.

      Much love,
      Chris

  • Teresa

    The relaxed drowsy awakenings of my day allowed the scent of cinnamon to catch the attention of my nostrils as the delicate beams of sunlight shown through the open pathways found in the window… The only sound I hear besides my internal friend is the melody chirping from the trees outside… Aaahh, Sunday morning! The start of a new day, a clean slate of life to be written upon by the opportunity of decision ;-) Thank you for the gift to write on this beautiful day …

    • Carie Bean

      What an absolutely wonderful comment! Teresa you my dear soul made me say WOW! what a wonderful way to create your day and share your love and gratitude for it all! Very inspired by your message. I think it complimented Chris’s words perfectly! Bravo! Standing ovation! Beams of light are shining through my heart as we speak from your obvious ability to appreciate life!

    • Chris Assaad

      Poetry in motion. Thank you for sharing your gift with us :)

  • LoriHil

    Thanks so much Chris. As writers on a personal development/spiritual journey, sometimes those down and vulnerable moments make us want to set our work aside. I have found that the times I continue to write through them, however, seem to be the words that others most connect with others. In the personal development, creative world we sometimes feel like we have to have it all together or at least appear so. But, working through the struggles, the times we don’t want to write, and being vulnerable with others about what is truly going on, often brings the most rewards.

    • Chris Assaad

      So true Lori. It takes courage to show up and write or create when we’re feeling exposed, vulnerable and even a little broken but as you shared, those are the times when our expression is most real and relatable. Thanks for speaking truth into this space and elsewhere. Much love :)

  • http://victorialynnhall.blogspot.com/ Victoria Lynn Hall

    Thank you for this post. It was exactly what I needed to read today.

    • Chris Assaad

      Happy to hear!

  • ellen

    Glad to have read this now. Glad to have showed up for my writing. Thank you!

    • Chris Assaad

      Awesome. Glad you did too :)

  • Beverly

    I dream of Bali. It is no wonder you are there now!
    Many need to remember the most tragic things that happen in your life are the greatest gifts. Look back in your life and see how the changes came as a result of a “forced” change through an auto accident, illness, etc. I know myself I would be spinning on a hamster wheel instead of seeking growth all these years if not for my auto accident. I have met amazing people, but most of all experienced amazing places because my path took a different direction because of an event in life. I believe it is Gods way of knocking on our nogins. Think of where you can go from there!

  • VeegMama

    So glad you “showed up” to the page and decided to write. I can definitely relate and am so glad you shared. Great post – thank you!

  • Drowningnfeelings

    Thank you Chris for sharing your lesson learned to help me through my situation. I needed this message cause I have been down this slope off and on for months and want my power back. Right now it’s challenging to see the good down the path when all I feel is lose of hope! I pray for the strength to get through the pain. Thank you Chris for shedding light on my challenge. Abundant Blessings

  • Bryony Klink

    What a beautiful and uplifting message :)