Get your self-respect back!

To listen to the audio version of this blog, click here.

What if it was your vulnerability rather than your “faux perfection” that inspired others?

One of the trends I see, first in myself and now in others – especially those of us who want to do the kind of work that I do – is that we are trying to be perfect. And there’s a part of us that knows that we are not perfect, we are perfectly imperfect human beings – and so when we try to be perfect, that part of us that knows that we’re not calls BS.

And when that part of us that calls BS speaks, we feel like a fraud. And when we feel like a fraud we tend to close down because we know on a deep level that we can’t really help people if we are being a fraud.

And so what happens? We can kill our own dreams by not taking action, because we are not truthfully representing whom we REALLY are.

But, the thing is, since NO ONE is perfect – they will FEEL the truth in your authentic sharing of not being perfect and THAT will inspire them FAR more than claiming any kind of spiritual perfection.

Who you naturally are is FAR more inspiring than who you pretend to be.

This is the fact. And what ELSE is cool is when we stop pretending to be someone and just start being ourselves, we are no longer BSing ourselves and so we actually take our power back, instead of giving it away by pretending to be perfect.

And as we start to respect ourselves more, we take more action and as we take more action grounded in self-respect, really cool things start to happen and a positive cycle of momentum is created.

This is what I mean when I say that your vulnerability is FAR more inspiring than your “faux perfection”. No one is perfect. And anyone who claims to be is trying to sell you something.

Human beings are moved by authentic emotional sharing, not stoic perfectionism.

For the next 30 days, instead of trying to look good, just share your experience. What you’re going through. Share your insecurities. Let down your wall and let your friends and family know the REAL you. And let anyone go who isn’t down with that.

So, where in your life are you trying to be perfect? Where are you not telling the truth and BSing yourself? Do you want to get your self-respect back? Then TELL the truth! As always, the action happens in the comments below; leave a comment and join the conversation! The TDL Community thrives in the comments and it’s a GREAT place to get support!



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Mastin Kipp is the CEO and Founder of The Daily Love. Follow him on Twitter here.

Take what resonates with you in this blog and leave the rest.

  • Mercywolf

    Wow, synchronicity! I have been teaching meditation for a couple of years and am about to launch an online business to really try and get out there with my particular approach. My vibe from the beginning has always been to be truthful and to show my vulnerability, as I think it can be so easy for beginner students especially to look up to someone who’s been meditating as long as I have, as someone wise and perfect. And as long as people see you that way, they will always feel like they’re falling short of the mark, and I want my students to feel encouraged and hopeful. With my online launch looming I was feeling daunted today in light of some of the other teachers out there who do seem to present as perfect. I was questioning how it may look to the public that I openly admit my shortcomings, and this blog post – I only heard about the Daily Love an hour ago – is Universally timed. Thank you! With love

  • Indeed… I smile very often, especially when I’m around people (or a mirror:P )

    And I remember someone telling me that she said to herself. There’s no way he’s happy all the time. That seems more real to people right?
    I’m enjoying the daily love, especially love the audio 🙂 Awesome Mastin (Y)

  • I am in so agreement that embracing your vulnerability is where your greatest strength lies. As in the eye of the storm, you will find your peace. Love is perfect. WE ARE THAT HUMAN MANIFESTATION OF THE PERFECTION OF LOVE. 

  • Wally Freimanis

    So I like to think that I am pretty accepting of my flaws and share them often. I work for the state of PA for a supervisor who is very unaccepting of my flaws and makes his judgement well known. He is incredibly knowledgable about the technical side of our work. Because of this managers love him. He also continually struggles with social appropriateness so he avoids interaction. I have been trying to find a new position but have not yet found a new opportunity. Does anyone have any advice in the mean time to make time at work bearable?

  • ituderevolution

    So true. I’m reading Brene Brown’s ‘Daring Greatly’ at the moment and recognise so much of this truth. Vulnerability and releasing the myth of perfection is the path to being truly connected, to truly love and be loved.

  • TDL reader

    The best post ever Mastin!! And to let go of anyone who isn’t down with that. So true….I always bond with real people, and the ones that try to fit you into a mold….wish them well but drop them. When I try my hardest to suppress my truth, it comes out in other ways. Better to just be honest. I’m trying to be stronger in myself in not being ashamed to be unabashedly myself and make no apologies for that! I’m getting there. It’s a learning experience I tell you! I’m from Australia, and recently our Prime Minister who is a woman, gave the most powerful speech on sexism and misogyny, to hear that speech and watch her stand up for our rights brought tears to my eyes and I was fist pumping the air! Gave me so much strength to hear someone unabashedly confront head on an issue that is more often than not addressed.

    Google ‘Julia Gillard Mr Slipper Speech’. So thank you God….more of this to instigate change, I replay when ever I feel weakened, this gives me strength as a woman particularly.

    Great post Mastin 🙂

  • Garth

    Newcomer here…I love your site! I have always been honest and vulnerable but constantly have to deal with people who say what i want to hear and don’t deliver in many aspects of life.  The phrase “I ‘ll call you back” really means chances are pretty good they won’t call back.  I drop my car off at a professional mechanic and hear “We’ll take care of it….”  a week later i call; Is it done yet? “No, i haven’t even looked at it but u still have your truck to drive!” Gee, i don’t want to drive my truck that gets crummy gas miles.  I have a wonderful life for a (financially) poor man but find it difficult to make friends or new associations with folks who are not FOS and full of BS. Even folks from church. It hurts me emotionally some but i am getting used to it.  I have learned “Don’t take it personal.”

  • TDL Reader

    I have been coming to the TDL for inspiration for about a year now and this post definitely resonates with me. I have been trying to appear perfect for the past few years and keeping many secrets from my loved ones, but it has been weighing on me so heavily. It has also caused me to lose self esteem and self-respect. This reminds me that I have to be honest, no matter who I lose as a result. In the end, I will gain myself back. Thank you for yet another timely post.