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Here Is How You Change Even The Most Painful Experiences!

by Mastin Kipp on January 9, 2012

So this gout thing isn’t going away quickly. I remember the last time I had it, it took about a week or so for it to die down. So – I’m still feeling this pain daily and settling into the remedy and the lesson The Uni-verse is teaching me right now.

One of the things I’m present to at the moment is not just the pain that I feel, but also the space around the pain. It’s interesting; I have noticed that when I push against the pain with my thoughts – it actually increases the pain. But when I accept the pain, it creates space around the pain and it lessens. It doesn’t go away, but it’s not as aggressive and I also feel the rest of my body calm down when I do this.

And then this got me thinking about the space around things. You know, like the space around your thoughts, or the space around your words, or the space around what you say versus what you mean.

You might be thinking, “Mastin, what the HECK are you talking about “the space around” something? I don’t understand.

Well, the idea is that we have a thought, but we also have that part of us that is observing the thought. Or for me, I have the pain, but there is that part of me that is observing the pain. There’s anger, but then there is that part of us that is observing the anger.

It’s a cliché, but it’s true that where focus goes, everything flows. And then what we focus on expands. These are cliché’s because they are true. Our job is to become aware of what we focus on.

Are you focused on the problem or the space around the problem? That is to say, are you focused on the problem or that part of you that is observing the problem? Am I focused on the pain or that part of me that is observing the pain?

When we focus on the observer, or “the space around” an event or situation, we detach from the situation and realize it is not who we are. And when we de-identify with a situation, with pain, anger, frustration and the like, we can then begin to change and transform it. First, we can accept that it exists; then we can give it a new and empowering meaning; and then finally, we can take action on that new meaning.

When I first got this gout, I kept asking, “Why did this have to happen to me AGAIN!? And in the first week of the year?” And these questions were pushing against the situation and the pain. But then, quickly I started asking a new question: “What does The Uni-verse want me to learn from this?” And I started getting a new answer because I was focused on and aware of being the observer of my situation and I gave it an empowering meaning with that question.  As a result, I got a different answer because I put my focus on learning from this moment instead of playing the self-opted in role of victim.

When we begin to do this in all areas of life, our lives change dramatically. How can YOU become the observer of your life, realize that you are not the events, emotions or situations that you are witnessing, and then give what’s going on a new and empowering meaning and then take ACTION from that new meaning? Let me know, please leave a comment or feel free to email me at WhatImGoingThru@TheDailyLove.com

Love and space,

Mastin

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Mastin Kipp is the CEO and Founder of The Daily Love. Follow him on Twitter here.

Take what resonates with you in this blog and leave the rest.

I’m so excited to share with you that I’m doing my very first Online Class called Love Uni-versity! It starts on February 13th  – check it out by clicking here!

  • Amy

    Wow-someone had suggested this site to me and I never paid it much attention until today. I finally read your post…and it was excactly what I needed. I have always been a very positive, healthy person and after the birth of my daughter 2 years ago have experienced some not so fun “woman issues” that have no clear answers or relief. And like you got a dose of it the first week of the new year. I get very angry and frustrated but, to stop and ask myself what do I have to learn from this is a great thought….Not sure what I have to learn, but it does take my mind to a different place. Thank you!

  • http://twitter.com/BAngelsan bruno angel

    Mastin, diet is the key to conquering gout. I have not had an attack in over three years.

  • Becky West28

    GREAT post … thank you! Makes perfect sense!

  • Jon

    Mastin, a dear friend of my turned me on to your blog, and your issue with gout. If you will contact me, I’ll give you the remedy I used and have shared with many others for years. While Bruno is somewhat correct — that diet is a factor — the diet recommended by most is ‘not’ optimal, and there are several very valuable supplements that simply ‘work’. Happy to share it with you. jb at jonbenson dot com

    Cheers, Jon

  • Ghismonda

    Love it. It’s certainly my experience that resistance causes pain. Acceptance of what is allows growth and understanding to occur.

    I love that you chose not to be a victim in your experience. Thanks for sharing.

  • Mbpel326

    Mastin, I’m sorry to hear about your pain with gout and hope you’ll feel better by tonite :) I understand working again st the pain . It’s been very hard for me to keep falling victim to the pain I feel. I’m working everyday to view how I feel more positively . Dealing with depression and being in pain has been so hard for me to not feel so hopeless and count my. Blessings. I’m repeating it over and over in my head so it sticks in time. I quit smoking and am working on my weight issues and avoiding stuffing my feelings down. Ok so except it and give it space. Thank you for your help its changing me for the better every day. With MUCH gratitude, Adrienne

  • Antonia

    Mastin, I suppose in a way you are saying “the pain” is not your identity, the pain is a feeling that is happening to you and we need not become the pain so to speak…the challenge is the pull back to observer but worth it. Thx M

  • Kathryn

    Sweet.  Thanks for sharing.

  • Sirvart10

    This is how we all need to hear and learn everyday…Great job Friend, Mastin and keep the great work. Thanks…