And, if you’re like me, you spread yourself too thin because you say “YES” – WAAAAAAY too much! Like WAAAAY more than you should.
As TDL has been expanding and things get more and more awesome, I have had to say “no” more. And it’s not because I don’t like the people or things I’m saying “no” to. It’s just because I know what I’m focused on and why I am focused on it.
My purpose is to create content and communities that inspire people to feel like they belong. And I manifest this through TDL at the moment. And WHY I am focused on this is because when I feel like people feel like they belong to themselves and a community, that is the best and fastest way to heal and change the world. This is what DRIVES me, this is what FUELS me, and this is what PUSHES me and gets me UP in the morning.
But within that desire are next steps. And I focus on the next step and try not to get too caught up in the next two steps or five steps or ten steps, because usually after you take a step, something new happens that will cause you to pivot and change course. (This is what creating a start-up is like.)
But, I have a HUGE heart and I LOVE to say, “YES”. I say “YES” to everyone because I WANT to do everything. But I’m coming to terms with the fact that it’s not true. In fact, if you call my cell phone and get my voicemail it says, “This is Mastin, my answer is YES and my message is LOVE.” I think it’s time to change that!
When you are focused on what you want and why you want it, it becomes crystal clear what you should say, “YES” to and what you should say “NO” to.
But a lot of times I say “YES” when I should be saying “NO”. And in doing so, I overwhelm myself and end up not being as productive and focused as I could be on fulfilling my purpose. Then I FEEL BAD by saying “no”.
But the thing is, the more POWERFUL the “NO”, the more POWERFUL the “YES”. I’m trying my best right now to graduate past saying “YES” because I would FEEL BAD if I said “NO” and step into making choices that are in strict alignment with my purpose.
It’s true that where focus goes, energy flows (yeah, I know it’s a cliché), but it’s true! And when you are focused on saying “YES” because you’d feel bad otherwise, you are denying your dreams because you are making the approval of someone else more important than the approval of your dreams.
It’s actually a little selfish to say “yes” when you really mean “no”. You are not taking the wise and bold route of being aligned with your truth, but rather outside validation. And this ends up creating resentment inside you and inside the other person. Why?
Because we are energetic beings and we send signals like this to each other in the undercurrent of our minds and bodies.
Do you have the courage to say “NO” today instead of “yes” because you want validation? I’m trying to muster it up – will you join me?
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Mastin Kipp is the CEO and Founder of The Daily Love. Follow him on Twitter here.
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