Live Inside Out Not Outside In! - Daily Love with Mastin Kipp

Live Inside Out Not Outside In!


beware…the content of this blog may apply to grown ups ūüėČ


Dana-1One thing I have said to my own kids and my students, too, is that:

everything happens for a reason.

We may not always know the¬†lessons¬†in the stuff that happens to us, and that’s because we sometimes get so caught up and attached to what WE¬†WANT¬†TO HAPPEN!

In other words, WE WANT CONTROL, RIGHT????

FLASHBACK to my chubby, freckly, middle-school self: 

I can remember trying to¬†get¬†other kids to like me or be nice to me.¬†That sounds so weird to me as I write it down as a grown up (although I must admit I still catch myself doing it!!!! YIKES! Please don’t tell anyone!)


In 6th grade, I remember¬†“liking”¬†a boy named Kenny (last name to remain anonymous…¬†shout out to Kenny if you’re reading my blog!), and I wanted him to “go” with me (whatever that means in middle school…). I gave him, like, over 20 packs of gum, wrote notes to him, took ridiculous detours through my school so I would see him between classes, and lots of other¬†cRaZy¬†stuff.

…what we do for love… ūüėČ

GUESS WHAT?…Kenny never¬†“liked”¬†me back¬†ūüôĀ ¬†sad face ¬†and, of course, in my mind¬†I made up¬†that it was because I was chubby and freckly (he never told me that, though–he barely talked to me at all!)

DANG[email protected]@#^%&% …that was a lot of gum…


I know you can all relate—like, for example, thinking:

If I keep kissing butt to the kids who¬†(I think)¬†don’t like me . . .

  • maybe they’ll¬†stop treating me like¬†crap
  • maybe they’ll quit¬†taking my stuff¬†or¬†copying off my homework
  • or even stop¬†hating¬†me on Facebook
  • or at the very least maybe they will¬†LEAVE ME THE HE(L)K ALONE!¬†(I can remember actually praying about this one as a kid…)

When I was¬†really¬†in a fantasy land, the stuff I made up in my head was even more wishful–like, for example, thinking:

  • maybe they’ll invite me to their¬†lunch table¬†(that’s a huge one!!!!)
  • maybe I’ll get to go to one of their¬†sleepovers
  • maybe we could go to¬†summer camp¬†together!

You get the picture, right?

Trying to manage what other people think or feel about us is living from the¬†OUT:SIDE IN.¬†Living from the¬†OUT:SIDE IN¬†is, quite frankly, a butt load of work. But here’s the good news:

You can relax…¬†(and actually, take a deep breath now! I am¬†controlling¬†you! LOL!)

Living from the¬†IN:SIDE OUT,¬†not the¬†OUT:SIDE IN, is much easier!¬†And,¬†(top secret information)¬†even some of the grown ups don’t know this…but you can share it with them, if you think they are ready…

What I know now, is that I can’t¬†get¬†other people to like me, be nice to me, or anything else! My job is to¬†be¬†myself¬†(who, BTW, is very likable!), like and love¬†myself, ¬†and¬†surround¬†myself¬†with others who like¬†me¬†for¬†me. I don’t actually have to¬†DO¬†anything–just be¬†myself. Whew!

I wish I would have known this stuff earlier…(which is one awesome reason I started my blog, really).

Actually, knowing now that this stuff is just plain out of my control is such a relief!

And guess what? I get to breathe, enjoy myself, and just be the best person/mom/teacher/friend I can be… and I think I actually do a better job of¬†all¬†those things when I am not freaking out trying to control things from the¬†OUT:SIDE IN¬†all the time!!!!!

Let me know what your thoughts and feelings are!

Love and Light,



Dana Lynne Curry, Ph.D., has been teaching middle school English (with no low bun) for over 23 years. She is a gReaT-fuL Writer, Storyteller, Teacher, Student, Irreverent GoofBall, Blogger, Servant, Philosopher, Spiritual Collagist (is that a word?), Mama, LoVer of LiFe!, Amazing Friend, and one cOOL pUsSy caT!! Find Dana at funfreeME  on Facebook and on Twitter @funfreeMe1.