Love Your Ego, Love Your Life!

I once believed that enlightenment was reached by ridding oneself of ego. In my early teens, I was so frustrated by the power my ego had over me that I broke down in uncontrollable tears. I asked The Uni-verse why I was struggling with detaching from my ego.

Then, like a divine lightning bolt hitting me I realized, “trying to rid yourself of ego is your ego’s work.” It had me chasing a ghost, spinning in circles, distracting me of who I really was and what my true life purpose would be. If The Uni-verse had created me with my ego intact, then there had to be a reason I had an ego.

That reason is my ego allows me to fully experience my humanity here on this earth. I started to be thankful for my ego instead of fighting it and I embraced what it had to say to me. I learned what my ego was fearful of and instead of fleeing from it, I spoke to my ego with love and kindness. I thanked my ego for showing me what it was fearful of because now I knew what I needed to accomplish in this life. Our greatest fears can become our greatest accomplishments.

When my ego becomes very loud within me, I treat it like a child having a tantrum. Are you going to love the child or try to rid yourself of the child as a result of the tantrum? Most would ignore the behavior and then deal with the fact that the child is just looking for attention; your ego is doing the same – it’s looking for attention.

Just as you would say to a child in a tantrum, you would say to your ego, “I love you; however, I do not love your behavior. I am going to take three deep breaths and listen to the inner dialogue between my higher self and my ego, giving my ego the attention it is seeking.”

I do not choose to follow my ego’s guidance as it is never my truth; I am however allowing it to do what it was created to do – give me choice and challenge my infinite self. That is it; the ego was created to give choice and perspective. Our egos just want to be heard from within. The ego does not care if you follow its guidance; the ego just wants to be heard so that it has done its job, because your ego’s role is to help you achieve greatness.

When I started to listen to my inner dialogue with my ego intact, my intuition became 100% clearer and I continue to evolve, learn and grow through life with a greater sense of ease. I learned to love my ego and my ego showed me to love my life. I decided a long time ago to make it my mission to share the gift of knowledge that was given to me about ego, and to also shine my inner light so bright that I may inspire others to shine theirs.


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Tara Taylor
Intuitive Counselor & Published Author “Through Indigo Eyes”.!/TaraTaylorIntuitive

  • a.

    AMAZING!!! <3<3<3

    • Tara Taylor

      Wonderful to hear the post spoke to you:)

  • Dr. Kath

    When I saw the Dalai Lama in Atlanta two years ago, he said the ego is a good thing; without it we’d have no self esteem. It’s only when our ego creates a separation of “us” and “them” that it becomes a problem. 

    • Tara Taylor

      Thank you Dr. Kath for your insight and comment:). I just adore His Holiness! Yes, that is when one knows we are in our ego self, when we are thinking in “me” not “we”. The goal is to love and let the ego know we are grateful for its role in our lives and to show compassion to the ego by just listening to its concerns. It all boils down to our egoself expressing its fear of losing its oneness with the world that has come from an old fix belief passed down from more fear…as we know that is not our truth, as we are always in oneness with the Uni-verse!

  • Jcev75

     Great Share! Thank you. 🙂

    • Tara Taylor

      Thank you for your comment:)

  • Tara – you hit it out of the park with this blog!!!

    • Tara Taylor

      YAY, Thank you Mastin!:)

  • Tara Taylor

    Such an honor to share the love with Mastin and the TDL Team! Let’s spread the word and love our WHOLE self with ego and all!

  • Thank-you for providing the clarity of the difference between the Ego and Higher Self! We forget that the Ego does play an important role in us being human — but that doesn’t mean it has to run the show! LOL! Thanks, Tara!!

  • P.S: Love the personal story about your struggle with it too! Nice to know we are not alone 🙂

  • Penny

    I never understood the power of the ego and how much more clarity you get once you know that you do have a choice.  A child having a tantrum is the best way to simplify it!  Thanks for all that you teach us Tara!

  • anon

    As I started reading this I had one of those “wow” moments, because this is exactly where I am up to in my personal development. Having rid myself of my ego a while back in favour of living from a more spiritual place, essentially getting my ego under control instead of the other way around… well now having done that work, I am at the point where I am ready to embrace my ego once more. My ego is the expert on personal boundaries  Without the ego, we become a pushover because we can endlessly put things in perspective and dissolve our emotions. I am now at the stage where re-engaging with my ego is the next step. I am at the point where I now realize that my ego’s desire to show off, get attention from others, have sex, fight with others if necessary are all part of being the person I was born to be. Some people may not like me for my ego. Some people may judge me for my ego. My ego is so unperfect and inconvenient at times, it competes, it has silly desires… but it also gives us definition. It says “this is who I am” and I am different and separate from “you”. If we can remember the lesson of oneness with all of creation from living from a place of no ego and at the same time assert ourselves as individuals with needs that are allowed to be met, then we can be empowered. I don’t agree about the child having a tantrum thing from where I’m at right now. I believe that the child is communicating something with the tantrum and should not be punished or ignored or just given attention. I believe we need to look at the need that the child is trying to meet that is causing the tantrum. There is no such thing as ‘bad behaviour’- there is only effective ways of communicating via behaviour and ineffective ways. If you ignore the child’s needs, the child only has a tantrum to use to draw attention to that need. Meet the child’s needs and there are no tantrums. At the same time, teach the child that you will always listen and help them meet their need so they can communicate effectively and get the need met in a more sociable way in future. If your ego is having a tantrum, you are probably neglecting yourself in that area. Otherwise it wouldn’t be so desperate for attention that it has to have a tantrum.

    • Tara Taylor

      Wondeful share and that you are embracing the whole you! Many blessings to you:)

  • lizilynx

    A MAJOR contribution!! For peace in the world and finding solutions we need to come TOGETHER rather than perceive a sense of “us and “them”. Listening to our ego and recognizing its value to us. We ARE all One with The Uni-verse. Thanks to you & His Holiness The Dalai Lama for bringing clarity here! :o)

    • Tara Taylor

      Thank you for your comment and LOVING your greatness!

  • wow, I never thought of it that way; thanks for sharing! 🙂

    • Tara Taylor

      Hi Aurora Rose Truth:), thank you for your comment and embracing all the love that you are!

      • Hi Tara Taylor, you’re so welcome; thank you for embracing all of the name that I have ;D

  • Angie

    This is fantastic and I really needed to hear this today 🙂 Thank you.

    • Tara Taylor

      You are perfect Angie! Every part of you! Many blessings to day and everyday:)

  • Tommy

    “Love is the most powerful force the world possesses. This power lives within the hearts of each of us. Today I will focus on my heart and cast the gift of a loving thought into the heart” of every friend. By sharing loving thoughts my heart is strengthened for I know that every loving thought I send out will be returned to me many times over” ~ George MacDonald

    I believe my ego is my adaptive. and rebellous child part, and my critical parent part. And these parts of me are seeking attention and recognition, and will do anything to get it. (speaking as ego, I will use I)
    I can make you sick, I can cause you pain if you don’t obey me, I can sabotage your dreams, I can keep you confused, I can create fear in you, I can punish you, I can make you feel unworthy, I can make you feel inadequate, I can make you feel unloved, not good enough, unattractive, etc.. I can make you feel helpless, and dependent on me, or others, I can make you feel a failure, I can cause you doubt, and make you lose your dreams, I can possess you, and control you by making you become addictive to my desires (excessive alcohol, smoking, eating, sweets, drugs, excessive sexual partners, greedyness, power, recognition, status, etc)

    I also am my free loving child, (which I am, when born) and I am my nurturing, supportive loving parent part, which expresses, and shows love to my inner child, with encouragement..

    And I am my Adult part, which decides, and over-sees the ego learned behaviour, and links up to my Higher Self..

    And my free child aligns with my nurturing loving parent and inwardly communicates with my Adult part and aligns with my Higher Self.

    When I allowed my communication with my inner emotional child, (and allowed all my parts to feel sadness, and grieve over my Mom’s passing) I was also allowing my ego part, and all my other parts to align in unison, and all feel loved. I do believe I can communicate Love to my Ego, and this part of me listens, and does feel Love also now.

    My ego is the part of me growing up, that has been pushed, punished, controlled, and programmed to distrust, and therefore has a rebellous nature.. because of the lack of trust, love, and not being listened to when small, and then developing child behaviours to be noticed.. and this developed when small, and got it alot of attention when crying, and learned to control at an early age, and its become power crazed to get attention more and more now. (I believe most ego’s are the rebellous child part seeking attention anyway it can get it)

    I believe becoming truly free is to make friends with the ego now, and love this part also.
    When genuinely praised, and feeling loved.. it too will become different, and change. Love changes everything, and everyone.

    I believe all of our parts are good.. and once we recognize this, and start living from this knowing.. we will be different… How can we have bad parts ? And to have parts that are condemned, and looked upon as bad, will just keep them manifesting this way.. What we focus on, and expect we create more of…

    I prefer to LOVE All of Me, my good, and so called bad parts, and the more I Love myself (all of me) the more Love I will receive and experience back from all of me.

    Why blame one part, or parts ? I am All Parts… Unconditional Love is the way to Freedom. And telling myself I Love All of Me.. (all my parts that make up physical me) and then I can Align all of me with my Higher Self me also….

    Jesus said, the Father (Higher Self/Source) and I are one (one in alignment) not in a separated alignment) with certain parts.. 🙂 Tommy