I have been writing a lot lately about the delicate dance of relation-SHIP, and by relation-SHIP, I literally mean SHIP–like, as in relation-SHIPs are journeys, not destinations.
Sometimes, travel is smooth and beautiful, and the water is crystal clear and the skies are baby blue. Whew!
Other times, waters are murky and tumultuous & filled with predators, and the sky is pitch black, rainy and thunderous–Scary!
Most of us have a destination in mind when we go on a journey, and this is often true of a relation-SHIP, as well. We have an idea of where we want it to go, and so often, we have OUR PLAN (destination) in mind . . . and we forget to really see and appreciate the person in front of us and we don’t live authentically in our own skin.
This is also true when we meet someone and assume they have nothing to offer us. We never see the gifts they potentially could offer us in our life ‘cuz we think we have it figured out before we even allow the relation-SHIP to develop.
I don’t know about you, but some of the coolest journeys I have taken are just getting in the car and starting to drive–without knowing where I am going . . . OR (even better) . . . having a set destination and then getting lost or going on a detour and ending up somewhere even more amazing than I had ever imagined . . . (I’m sure you know where I’m secretly going with this by now!).
Relation-SHIPS are journeys, not destinations, and if we open ourselves to fully experiencing another person, while being authentic at the same time, the possibilities are endless! Hello!
For those of us who have ever chased a relationship, this notion can be a huge relief. Personally, I’d rather be my imperfect, crazy, awkward self–with someone who appreciates me for all of it–than try to be perfect with someone who constantly corrects me, criticizes me, and wants me to be different than who I am. Bye-bye!
When we open ourselves up authentically to others, we may be surprised where the journey, the relation-SHIP carries us. Where has an unexpected relation-SHIP taken you?
Leave me a comment and let me know!
Dana Lynne Curry, Ph.D., has been teaching middle school English (with no low bun) for over 23 years. She is a grateful writer, storyteller, teacher and student. Find Dana at funfreeME and on Twitter @funfreeMe1.