Visual Inspiration: Let GO!

October 3, 2012 by Mastin Kipp 15 Comments

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Lindamac4545

Wow, this could not have come at a more appropriate time. After 29 years of marriage my husband just told me that he was no longer happy. I truly didn’t see it coming, as we just came back from an amazing vacation and he was telling me how lucky he was. So I am walking around in a fog right now, because I don’t know what the next step is. He said he wasn’t sure when he was leaving, but just that we are going in different directions. I have been a part of a couple for a very long time, and the thought of being single again is very scary.
Thank you for the article.
- KMOme
  
  I feel for you, Lindamac4545… I can only imagine what you’re going through right now….best wishes to you!
  - Lindamac4545
    
    Thank you so much. Your comments meant a lot to me.
- Susanre5
  
  I have recently experienced a very similar situation, married for 30 years and my husband decided to leave. We have grown children but it is still complicated and difficult. However, I am trying to find the silver lining by renewing old interests and finding new ones. If I stayed married, my life going forward would probably have been status quo. I did not anticipate this happening but I feel I will some day look back with thanks.
  - Lindamac4545
    
    Susanre5 I am sorry you are experiencing the same thing. It feels like I have been blindsided or maybe even betrayed because he kept telling me how much he loved me . He travels internationally all the time, so I a use to being alone for up to 10 days, but always knew that he would come back. Now the realization that he will be leaving permanently, moving to the other side of the country, and I will be taking care of all the household duties is overwhelming. I so appreciate your comments and know that my heart goes out to you.
KMOme

Seems its a very common thing, being rejected.
For me it seems that whenever I think I aligned with people of similar ideals and let them get close (not an easy thing for me!) they turn around and reject me. This last time was my own blood. From one day to the next I wasn’t ____ enough anymore. Not “positive” enough to support them through tough times, not “strong” enough for the truth, not “whatever” enough to be part of the family anymore.
I appreciate today’s blog, and I understand that my reaction is the only thing I have control over.
I guess I’m doing a pretty lousy job of getting my reactions in check otherwise I wouldn’t be getting this lesson over and over and over.
If you weren’t blessed with self confidence this is a tough hamster wheel to get out of.
Ms Mb83

To be rejected is to be accepted. It means that someone or some circumstance recognizes and accepts that you deserve something different, perhaps better.
http://twitter.com/andrefeleci andre.a.feleci.a.

Letting GO. Im in month 8 of a 9 year relationship break up. It seems to be getting HARDER as I go on. See, right about now I would run back for that safety ne(s)t I left behind. My relationship had been on brinks for years now. The difference is the latter years now include a very in tune 4 year old boy. HE wants his mom and dad to be happy together. HE wants to see that. And I want it for him. I really do. And for 3.5 years of his life MOMMY tried to make that happen. As lovers we grew apart. There was barely ever a friendship to begin with so our interest completely clashed. We just didnt get along. We hadnt for a while. But we held on. Ultimately causing the LONGEST SKID MARKS you’d ever see! Shit Stains, literally and figuratively. So the STINK of the SHIT just carried itself throughout out relationship and it was time for LAUNDRY!!!! {I just experienced an extreme AH HA moment while typing to whoever is reading, changing the course of this lil note here!} I said all this to say, He wants me back. I fight the memories and remind myself WHY we aren’t together. The arguments grew violoent over the years. I cant allow my son to be raiwsed my a MEAN man! I will not allow him to be abusive or mean towards women. HE needs to know HE has responsibilities AS A MAN, and being there it was almost inevitable. *sigh* So I left…. sometimes I think that if it were for ME, I would stay. I would try, AGAIN. But I cant do that! I have a son to live for. And a ME to live for! I want so much more than Ive gotten! And its all because of MY THOUGHTS and allowing that invisible BOX to close in on me! I allowed someone elses life to take precedence over what I wanted for my own. All because I FEAR REJECTION. See, he had already accepted Me for who I was… My lack of Self Love and Poor Self Esteem had me believing What I got, What I had, Was ALL I Deserved! Im learning as I fight these love pains and PRESS ON FORWARD! It is definitely the hardest thing to do. Fight LOVE with LOVE. Know Better Do Better. Love from a DISTANCE. Pray for Others. Wish them the Best. Head High. Chin Up. Forward March!
Thx for reading…. There is no point. I totally drifted off! I MUST Be Comfortable Here…. Much <3 All Day Every Day!!!!!
- Leannemcclean
  
  amazing! good luck, i wish you only the best for you and your son. remember that you are sooo worthy, and accepting less than the best just does not do you justice! Love and peace xxxx http://www.urbanoptimist.com
CJ

This too is lesson I struggle to accept. I’ve been single for the past five years and I was dating someone for two of them without a commitment. (stupid, I know). I’ve been saving my heart for him hoping he comes to his senses. I’ve racked my brain for two years wondering why he won’t commit and that it must be me. I realized this week that I need to let him go. It has been the most excruciatingly painful thing I’ve ever had to do and I’ve shed a lot of tears this week. As much as I wish he was a man… he’s not. He’s a boy not ready to man up. This email couldn’t have come at a better time. Trying to put a different meaning to this is hard but it is the one thing I can control.
Joy

I am dating a man who doesnt trust me. I am still with him because I love him. I tried breaking up with him because I know I deserve someone who trusts and love me as I am but its so hard. When we break up I end up running after him and he uses rejection as his weapon. Being rejected is something I cannot handle, so I am thankful for this article. I will try to see rejection as grace. I know I cannot control what others think of me but I can control how I take it and I should start thinking and loving me. WE are going to talk tonight if we are going through with this relationship or not. It scares the shit out of me to think I can be alone again after this but I know i cannot live like this forever….
- Lindamac4545
  
  Hi Joy~
  I know the feeling of being scared, I am right there with you. I think the key word
  you used and I need to feel as well is deserve. I deserve to be with someone who wants to be with me, and I need to stop holding onto the energy of ‘needing’ him, even though he is my best friend. I hope whatever the outcome, you will be fine and the Universe will make sure of it. Blessings. ~ Linda
Willie

I was just let go of the love of my life – we bonded spiritually first as friends and then became best friends, lovers and soulmates. We both recently came to the same conclusion about why we triggered each other. We we were mirrors to each other – that help both of resolve finally after after many years of struggling with ‘parent issues’ which affected this relationship and all past ones.

I wrote and read her a letter today – I came to the same place as her, however she thanked me for helping her and the lesson we experienced was great, however she has decided to move on without me.

I am crushed since she and I are totally on the same spiritual path and have learned through each other and trusted each other in safety – and now that we both have major breakthroughs at the same time – she still feels the need to move on.

I see what we went through as step 1 on the path to a true loving relationship where we share so much in common with each other and three children that will need extra special care because we both through horrible previous divorces saw our children affected by this – and they all already have the false seed in them and will require in my opinion two parents that understand this inside and out – forgive each other which i have already done and create a family environment which is loving, healing and as important than ever AWARENESS that the work that she and i have just gone through is just the beginning of healing for each of us as individuals, as a couple and as parents to children already affected by broken homes and it will take a whole lot of love, understabding, healing AND therapy.

I am writing this here since she has said its done and over. I have been told by her and therapy to let her go – and i am having a very hard time.

Please pray for her, me and our children. Thanks

Willie
- Lindamac4545
  
  Willie, I am so sorry you are experiencing this breakup with the love of your life. It is even more difficult when you have children at home. You have the right attitude, and time does heal some, but please take care of yourself first. You can not be there for your children, unless you are in an emotional place to do so. I will pray for you and your children. It appears that all of us on this blog are here because we now have a community to help us through this difficult time.
  Take good care.
  - Willie
    
    Thank you – much appreciated