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What burnout is trying to teach you…

1601491_10102332160174145_341053634589941908_nThe last couple of weeks I’ve decided to slow down my life. It’s been a hectic 2014, tons of travel and lots of new business going on.

I was also lifting weights 6 days a week and doing cardio almost every day to. Until I put my back out.

That was a massive pattern interrupt. And it helped me to create space in my life.

I had a big aha the other day, which was I am worth taking care of. I know that sounds a little crazy, but ever since Daily Love really got some legs, I’ve been so consumed with helping others, that I forgot to take care of me.

When my back went out, I knew it was a wake up call. And the reason why my back went out is because the muscle went into spasm. I had given up my yoga practice for weights only.

I don’t think that life wanted me to slow down – but I do feel that my body was asking for space. When there is enough space in your muscles, they don’t tend to spasm.

I chose to see this as a metaphor for my life. I needed more space. I had built a life where I was only focused on taking care of others, but needed to take care of myself.

I had classic giver’s remorse. And my body was asking for more time for me.

So, with that space, I decided to say no to projects, I went on the Clean Gut Cleanse and decided to really get in touch with what I wanted, rather than what I thought was demanded of me.

The results have been really awesome. What was burnout a couple weeks ago has transmuted into excitement. I feel reenergized and ready to keep going, knowing that I need to take care of myself.

I think one of the reasons we can get so caught up in and addicted to stress is because that we don’t believe we can survive any other way. But I don’t think this is true. I think that as we calm down our system, take ourselves out of “fight or flight” and focus on getting clear, we will see that life takes care of us in bigger and bigger ways.

Making decisions from a place of stress and fear can be good in the moment, but it’s not a very powerful long term strategy. It’s important to get clear and know that our needs can be met as we begin to take care of ourselves.

So, my question for you is this: are you worried that if you took care of yourself you won’t be supported by life?

What if that weren’t true. How would you take care of yourself if life would support you while you did?

In the comments below let me know!

Here’s to creating some space.

Lots of LOVE,

Mastin

P.S. Take what resonates and leave the rest.

  • Jillian Ratliff

    Oh my, yes, I have this fear. You’re right. It is hard to un-teach yourself that stress is “normal.” I usually try to defy normal but somehow missed this one. Good points Mastin. Thank you.

    • The Daily Love

      Thanks for reading today @jillianratliff:disqus <3 – Team TDL

  • Laura Wieck

    Mastin- You are so right on with this post today!

    As someone who teaches their clients to ‘listen to their bodies’ through my massage/coaching business, I had to get really honest with myself because I could hear my body telling me to slow down. It started as a whisper at first and is getting louder each day. I’m burned out and in need of a break.

    I have scheduled July off from seeing my clients. It will also give me a chance to re-evaluate how I run things and how I show up on a daily basis. While my body is thrilled for the space, the fear of ‘will I be supported if I take this break?’ is there.

    It’s time to trust. Listen to myself and listen to my heart. I am a MASTER!

    Love you, Mastin. I’m so grateful for all you do.

    -Laura

    • The Daily Love

      Powerful Laura! Let us know how it goes :) – Team TDL

  • Mary Robertson

    You are finding your way Mastin to fulfilling your purpose. As people who seek to inspire others, we too must learn as we move forward in life. Take care of yourself!!!

    • The Daily Love

      Thanks for sharing this Mary! <3 – Team TDL

  • Jbk941

    This could not have come at a more perfect time. Currently experiencing burnout myself. After the last few weeks of wallowing in stress and anxiety from preparing for a move I am making at the end of the month and considering a new job opportunity. I woke up this weekend with a million things to do plus a cold. I realized I had brought this on right away and it was my bodys way of making me slow down and take care of myself. Still struggling with accepting that it is okay for me to do so (ie put work to the side and rest)

    • The Daily Love

      Sounds like you’re on the right track Jbk! Thanks for sharing and reading today :) – Team TDL

  • DMM

    This resonated with me today as I took a much needed break from my job earlier this year. I worked at my company for 13 years and came to be very successful there. I loved the essence of what I did and the people but it was a very stressful environment and industry.
    I’ve been volunteering as a co teacher, mentoring and just learning how to relax and be happy alone. I’m now at a cross road. I started looking for a new job but feel torn…is this the perfect job? I didn’t accomplish everything on my list to do while on this hiatus like more travel, dating and cooking school…what if I pass up a job now then I don’t find another by the end of the year ? What if I should not have left my old job?

    How do I know what I do next?

    • The Daily Love

      What is your heart telling you DMM? Let us know! <3 – Team TDL

  • Heather T

    Mastin, I love how easily you describe what our bodies are telling us. I’m currently working through burnout and while I keep working on creating space in my life the fear of not being supported is “larger than life” right now. I keep wondering, if I make the changes I want, will I actually follow through and be successful in a new direction. Thank you for your kind words. They inspire and give me the much needed food for thought.

    • The Daily Love

      Thanks for reading and sharing today Heather! <3 – Team TDL

  • Carah

    Why I need to attend Daily Love Live – I’ve been fighting my group of seniors at the high school where I work. Reading this made me realize that they never asked for me to design these amazing lessons, and I was fighting their disinterest and lack of excitement. I was attached to the outcome and in essence I was angry at them. It was me who was doing too much, expecting too much in return. I return to my classroom today ready to apologize and precede with clarity and forgiveness toward myself. Ready to tell them that it was I who generating the conflict and that created the disharmony. Space is what I should have afforded them instead of judgment. Always a lesson.

    • WackyredDreamer

      Cerah, I hear you! I teach high school too and this is the craziest time of year. Not only am I battling anemia and fatigue, but I found out that my brain isn’t producing any FSH levels so my hormones are all out of whack which means none of my vitamins and stress relief techniques are even working for me and I Have been gaining weight. I’m finding each day a challenge to get out of bed and “show up” for my students when all I want to do is lay down! All that’s keeping me holding on at this point is knowing that summer break is coming. It will give me a bit of time to recharge. I always tell my students how much I appreciate them but that we need a break as much as they do :)

    • The Daily Love

      Beautiful awareness Carah! Thanks for sharing this with the community today! <3 – Team TDL

  • Elaine Stevens
  • Gail Allen

    Burnout has been building up for me for the past year. Then I added a new blog and coaching business and set a specific monthly financial goal to work toward. For the past month my life has been about working/commuting 12 hrs. a day then coming home and working on my business 4 more hours, only getting 5 1/2 hours sleep. I have totally been disregarding my self-care. Like you I hold my stress in my back. Several years ago I had surgery and have had many flair ups over the years. My goal now is to have freedom and ease in my life not stress!! Stress for me causes physical pain. Last night I slapped myself back to reality. I went for a 45 min walk, showered, meditated, made a green smoothie and listened to soothing music. I realize that I have to create a business that represents me not the formula my business coach has come up with. I have to do what feels right with my soul. I’m just going to chase the joy in my life, take baby steps and see where they lead me. This post just serves as confirmation that I’m moving in the right direction. Thanks Mastin :)

    • The Daily Love

      Beautiful Gail! Thanks for sharing this!! <3 – Team TDL

  • http://rcvane.com Rachel C Vane aka RC Vane

    Thank you, thank you, thank you for this post, Mastin. I don’t often get a chance to read your daily posts and I’m so glad I read this one… Giver’s remorse is my constant state: trying to financially support my family with my small business, taking care of the kids and my husband and regularly taking on everything that needs to be done and more.

    I always need to be reminded to slow down, say no and practice asking for help.

    • The Daily Love

      Yes Rachel!! Thanks for reading and sharing today :) – Team TDL

  • Anna

    Hi Mastin. Thank you. In my third week of sick leave. Felt like a huge falure and burnout. Just couldn´t do any more … You know how it is. So now I´m trying to take care of myself in stead of thinkin of everyone else. Because I´m worth it! One day at a time …

    • Emma

      Hi Anna,
      I am taking 4 weeks sick leave at the suggestion of my boss – I am a school teacher and my immediate reaction was “no way” but then I chose to see it as a gift to get myself back on track (what a great boss) but I know how you feel in terms of feeling like a failure…it’s not true though. We are totally worth it! Hope you recharge.

    • The Daily Love

      Beautiful realization Anna! Let us know how it goes <3 – Team TDL

  • carmelvalleyite

    Taking care of myself seemed selfish until I finally “got it” by attending Al Anon meetings. They taught me how important it is. I now have a much richer, rewarding life and there is no guilt because I know I’m deserving of all that life has to offer. And if Mama’s not happy, there’s nobody who’s happy!! Mama’s now happy and can give more to others.

    • The Daily Love

      Yes CarmelValleyite!! Love it! <3 – Team TDL

  • Karina Lopez

    It’s a curious irony that those of us on the path of conscious living and giving to others fear deeply that life won’t give back to us, which is my biggest fear. It’s one thing to know what it means to be giving, but another given to in return, since giving and receiving are different sides of the same coin. Burnout has been my greatest teacher and guide this year, moving me to pay attention to what I need in order to serve others. It isn’t always a pleasant feeling, but I’m learning to appreciate the lesson and anticipating, to paraphrase Rumi, the new delights I’m being cleared away for.

    • The Daily Love

      Thanks for sharing this Karina!! <3 – Team TDL

  • Karen4u

    Mastin, thank you for sharing your insights today and always. I love how your authentic self comes through in your writing. Today’s message reminded me that the space that “we create” in our lives allows Spirit to do it work (or miracles). We live in such a “doing” culture that we must remind ourselves in many ways “to be still and know” and be willing to allow Spirit to effortlessly lead the way. Here’s to more space in our lives! Thank you for sharing your love and light!

    • The Daily Love

      Yes Karen4u! Thanks for sharing!! <3 – Team TDL

  • Fé Avouglan

    I feel like what I believe about my life is so important and I really appreciate what you said about slowing down and life taking care of you anyways…I know it may sound counter-intuitive but I would like to embrace laziness…

    • The Daily Love

      Interested perspective Fe! Thanks for sharing! :) – Team TDL

  • Victoria W

    Thank you for this message Mastin. I am feeling burnt out for the past month or so and I always judge myself when I get to this place. I don’t want to do anything besides sit on my couch and binge watch netflix or read or sit on my porch and just enjoy the weather. I feel guilty for taking so much time to do nothing and I feel like I’m not being productive or accomplishing or moving forward in life. I don’t know what this time of rest will bring but I hope I can give just the permission and compassion to just be.

  • Elizabeth Spevack

    Such perfect timing. I used to feel driven and motivated with creative ideas bouncing around in my mind, looking for their time to be implemented. Now I feel like in many ways I’m pushing myself to go through the motions even when I just feel like doing nothing much. I think it’s time I practice a little bit more of what I preach!

  • Chelsea Schwartz

    Thanks for taking a moment to share a personal experience, Mastin. And right on cue, I’ve recently learned the same lesson and was nice to feel validated from seeing someone I admire realize this actualization. Making time for ourselves is something our society typically labels as a “non-priority” or condescends as “selfish” – but it’s actually 150% needed and perfectly okay to do.

  • Natalie Brooke Kellogg

    I definitely feel burnout lately. I just finished grad school (while working 2 part time jobs, being in school full-time, interning AND training for a half marathon) and during my last exam Saturday, that was 5 hours long, I broke down and started crying after. Then right after that I had a cancellation of something I was excited about because yes, I was trying to throw more in the mix….since then everything has been very emotional this week and I realized I have been so go, go, go the last 3 years finishing up graduate school, that I now have time to chill and I don’t know how. I am for sure feeling the affects of burnout. I hope now that I am only working, that I can focus some time on me and start training again for the marathon and hopefully the things I had planned for last Saturday will happen again, but burnout, is so common that we don’t realize it until we literally have pushed ourselves to tears and beyond!

  • Porky

    I have always had a problem with knowing when enough was enough. It’s not that I’m afraid the universe won’t support me. It’s more that I’m afraid I’ll fail to help someone. That if I take that break the REAL BIG ONE will pass by and I won’t be there to help. Thanks for making me think about myself as well as the hurt, alone and helpless. Even healthy people need a little energy and help sometimes. :)