Without self-acceptance self-help won’t work!

To listen to the audio version of this blog, click here .

I love my job. I seriously must have one of the coolest jobs in the world.

If you haven’t heard, we have a SUPER awesome free event happening November 12-16 called The Daily Love EXTRAVAGANZA.

I am interviewing 22 AMAZING people who are experts in their field. It’s SUPER exciting!

One of the people I’ve interviewed is a man named Robert Holden who is an AMAZING teacher. Make sure to check him out and read his books.

Robert and I were chatting back in August when I was in London and something he said hit me like a TON of bricks. He told me that without self-acceptance that self-help won’t work.


The way that I say it is that without self-acceptance your spiritual path is spiritual entertainment at best. I mean you might as well watch a movie and just observe someone else going through a transformation. It’s so true.

I’ve spent a lot of my life trying to “change” or “fix” myself. And what I’ve concretely come to understand is that The Path is not so much about changing or fixing ourselves as it is accepting ourselves. Acceptance of who you REALLY are is the beginning of a brand new life.

And not who you are on a personality level. Who you are on a SOUL level. That is to say – you are a Divine child of The Uni-verse, and when you accept that – you claim your Divine birthright, everything changes. This doesn’t mean your life will be showered in riches, but it does mean that you will begin to live a path that is in alignment with your highest creative potential.

Many times that means trials before revelation. Many times that means suffering before liberation. Many times that means breakdowns before breakthroughs. But when we start to ACCEPT all of this as part of the Path of being a Divine child of The Uni-verse, it gives our suffering, trials and breakdowns a different context. It becomes preparation instead of punishment. It brings purification instead of condemnation. And as we step into and accept our own Divinity, we also begin to realize that all other people are also Divine children of The Uni-verse and so we begin to feel a bond with everyone we meet.

Accepting this brings massive change, growth and miracles into our lives. Can you accept your Divine birthright?

As always, the action happens in the comments below; leave a comment and join the conversation! The TDL Community thrives in the comments and it’s a GREAT place to get support!



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Mastin Kipp is the CEO and Founder of The Daily Love. Follow him on Twitter here.

Take what resonates with you in this blog and leave the rest.

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  • Smpatriot

    Good morning!

    Just a heads up…I went to download the audio but the dropbox download link has a trailing closing paren “)” causing it to error. If someone can edit the url and remove the paren you’ll be all set.

    Thank you for The Daily Love. My girl friend Alecia introduced me to it and I’m really enjoying it. It’s been a blessing.

    •  hey there! Thanks for reading TDL and being a part of the family – we fixed the link!

  • starbeauty757

    Yes this is very true, many people as myself have wasted so many years trying to find myself and change myself failing to realize that all I had to do was accept myself for who I truly am and everything else will fall into place. 

  • Smpatriot
  • Really great post, Mastin. I’m glad you and Robert Holden lay this out so clearly. For a long time, I thought the reverse was true – that without self-help self-acceptance wouldn’t work. And, like you, I was constantly trying to fix myself. I ended up feeling worse in the process. It wasn’t until I sort of just let go of trying to be better than I thought I was and accepted who I am that, like starbeauty757 said, everything else started to fall into place. If you haven’t begun the process of truly accepting yourself yet, use this post as a springboard. You can do it!

    •  thank you Kristen! this is such a beautiful comment!! :o)

  • Amanda :)

    Thanks for the post Mastin! I have trouble accepting myself after hitting my bottom of I got an abortion, and literally for all that year I stopped caring about myself & what my intuition was trying to tell me a year ago. But  through this year of taking a journey deeper into knowing my self, higher self, etc., I accept who I am and the decisions I have made up to this point. Everything you do shapes who you are & your path. With the journey unfolding each day, even in times of great doubt, discomfort, emotion etc. I still accept who & where I am right now.  

    •  beautiful Amanda! you are a ray of light with your example!

  • Mickey

    I’d like to paraphrase that to “Without self-acceptance, nothing works…”

    I’ve always liked and tried to live by this quote which I think fits nicely with today’s topic:“Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.” George Bernard Shaw

  • GG

    I have a question for Mastin and everybody else here, because you are all so wise and helpful! How do you tell if you are actually practicing acceptance or if you have merely become apathetic? Take religious beliefs, for example. I feel like I don’t really “believe” in anything, because I will never know if there is an afterlife, if there is a god, etc. So if I am just a good person in this life, that’s all I can do. Then whatever happens, happens. When I express that out loud it sounds like I don’t care about anything, like I am just apathetic about everything. Any input from any of you would be appreciated.

    How to tell the difference between acceptance and apathy????

    Thank you for the Daily Love, I just LOVE it.

    • Stacey Olson (@Co_Lead)

      GG, it sounds like you are questioning your own curiosity and indecision about religious beliefs. What would happen if you allowed yourself to believe any idea about religion and afterlife. What would happen if you said “Self, I don’t know what is out there, or at the end, but that’s ok.”?
      You may feel apathetic about any topic until it becomes important later on. Feelings are fleeting but acceptance is more about behaviour -how you relate to others and yourself.

      • GG

         Thanks. Your quote is exactly how I feel: “Self, I don’t know what is out there, or at the end, but that’s ok.”

        I guess it doesn’t really matter what it sounds like when I express it out loud to anyone, does it?

  • Leah

    I love this post!!! 
    This has just inspired me to quote an amazing paragraph from the AA Big Book, p. 417 about acceptance in general, I hope you guys like this x”And acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. When I am disturbed, it is because I find some person, place, thing, or situation – some fact of my life – unacceptable to me, and I can find no serenity until I accept that person, place, thing or situation as being exactly the way as it is supposed to be at this moment. Nothing, absolutely  nothing, happens in God’s world by mistake. Until I could accept my alcoholism, I could not stay sober; unless I accept life completely on life’s terms, I cannot be happy. I need to concentrate not so much on what needs to be changed in the world as on what needs to be changed in me and in my attitudes.” 
    As written in your blogg Mastin, this paragraph can just be applied to ourselves as well…. let’s accept ourselves just the way we are, as the light of the world. 
    Love, Leah x

    • Josephbrim

      this is powerful! than you for sharing

      • Leah

        my pleasure. x

  • Juliestiel

    I love reading
    this…love the synchronicity of my life, as I was just saying this very thing
    to a friend of mine (as it has been occurring to me more and more lately!).

    You rock.

  • QuietMind 40/40

    I too spent time trying to “change” and at 38 had an awakening.. we are who we are (on a soul level) and  the most i could do is “shift”… shift from ways of being that are not working for ways of being the would work.. At every moment i am choosing.. even when i didnt think i was… the self acceptance is key to activating the already existing self support system that the Uni-verse has in place for us from the moment we incarnated. My life experiences began to mirror what i thought of myself when i held myself at my highest

  • Stacey Olson (@Co_Lead)

    Love this! It is so true that once we accept ourselves and our genius little souls, we stop denying part of ourselves. And yes, we begin to live a “path that is in alignment with your highest creative potential.” It doesn’t mean our world instantly turns to gold but all of a sudden we are not resisting and trying to row against the current.
    As always Mastin, fabulously and simply ingenious thoughts. :o)

  • I always know when I am not accepting my fellow teacher (often my husband and 5 year old), I am not accepting myself. In this moment, I am creating frustration with my husband on how he handled a difficult situation with our son this morning. Our daily ritual: getting him ready for school. A process that takes longer than most due to his spiritual challenges. My mind says, “My husband KNOWS BETTER. I CAN’T BELIEVE HE REACTED THAT WAY.”  The question begs, “How did I react?’  I chose to throw away my peace, judge my husband, and in front our child-undermine him. Oops (Not really). This is when I accept myself completely and remember who I REALLY AM (100% Love).  ‘I Can Only Give What I’ve Got.’ Cinnamon Lofton. It is then I will see my husband’s innocence and divinity. Today I asked him for forgiveness for MY part. The rest is none of my business. For the first time, I will not have a huge discusssion on this. I will not lecture. I will not preach. I will be UNCONDITIONAL LOVE. I am sure my hubby will be surprised. Today I will remind myself of the 12th Pathway to a Higher Consciousness, “I am perceiving everyone, including myself (and my husband) , as an awakening being who is here to claim his or her birthright to the higher consciousness planes of unconditional love and oneness.” Big Breath.  I’m back. I am Love. Thanks Mastin. butterflymaiden7.blogspot.com/

  • Grateful

    Powerful! Thank you so much for reminding me of this very important message.

    Last night I had a dream that I was an award winning triathlete.  My career was at an end and I was left with intense inner agitation. I said, “I’m not okay in myself”. As the dreamer I was then observing the triathlete and could see that she only felt okay when she was performing, and on a very high level.

    I mention this dream because your article this morning seems to be on the same wave-length.

    Thank you!

  • JanetteMarie

    This is one of your best posts to date.      I especially like what you said,   “when we start to ACCEPT all of this as part of the Path of being a Divine child of The Uni-verse, it gives our suffering, trials and breakdowns a different context.”     My, how imporant that is for us to remember when we’re in the throws of difficult times!   Thanks for sharing your wisdom.

  • Thanks for this blog. It reminds me of a period that I went through recently, similar to other periods where I was going through a challenge or trial.
    Several years ago when I was moving to another country, a person said to me that there may be times in your new journey when something that will happen that may not be an “ideal” situation. They turned around and said “accept it”; it make the journey easy. It is true one you self-accept then things become clearer and you can continue to progress forward. Thanks Martin for this blog.

  • Beautiful post! 

  • Robert Holden may have brought you the initial idea, but wow you carried it through to us perfectly – Thank you!

  • A Survivor

    Wow Mastin! Very on time. I am a 12 year Breast Cancer Survivor. I was diagnosed at 37 with 3 young children. By the grace of God I survived that. Last year I went through a divorce after 25 years of marriage. My ex is a total narcissist and complete control freak. I didn’t realize how much so…until I created some distance. Life is better for me than it has ever been. I will find TRUE love again because I AM worth it.  So I do agree that after breakdowns there are also breakthroughs. Thank you for your positive insights daily…it so helps. Stay positive always!

    • I’m in the throws of a divorce now and I know I’ll be better but my God it’s so difficult!  Thanks for letting me know there is hope!  You should be so proud of ourself for making it through!

  • Ninalukose

    this was incredible. I needed this. I thought I knew my self-worth but what was really lacking was my self-acceptance. What I know of myself. What I think of my self. Who I am and who I am meant to be. Thank you. 🙂

  • Thank you, Mastin.