S**t happens. Sometimes it keeps happening. And we think about all the things that always go wrong or continue to not be so perfect in our lives. How often do you keep what’s wrong in your focus? Have you really stopped to think about what’s right? Because no matter what feels so wrong, there is some right in your life too! Let’s talk…
On one day each week, I make it a point to and walk over to my favorite coffee house/bakery to write my articles after my morning routine of the gym: The Tibetan Rites, breathing, and some meditation.
So in this particular early morning hour, the sun was barely up, and I was walking in the chilly and brisk misty air to get to my coffee house, and I just felt this overwhelming sense of “Wow, everything just seems so right at this moment.”
I basked in the beauty of the weather and stillness of the streets. I noticed the lit gas lamps in my neighborhood and thought how picturesque it was.
I mean this is stuff you see in the movies, right? I noticed the morning bustle of the baristas in the coffee house and the smell of fresh baked pastries.
In my mind, people would kill for these moments: a morning or day of stillness just for themselves.
And here I am, living in this dream! Amazing…
It really took me back and then I thought about the VERY busy schedule throughout the week with all of my work commitments.
I tend to think about all the things that I have to get done, and I then I think about how I don’t always have a lot of time to just “be”.
I have to plan some of those moments out in advance. I get out my calendar and even THAT sometimes gets me frustrated and I think about how I could make that work out better!
So this morning as I inhaled deep breaths and walked through the mist, all seemed right with my world and I began to take stock of all the things that are right in my world.
And there are MANY!
Back in the day, my focus was on all the things that were wrong in my world, and I thought about it ALL THE TIME.
And there are still things that I consider to be “wrong”.
I was fixated on how I couldn’t bring myself out of feeling bad and how irritated I was about these things.
Can you relate?
But as I grow, reach for more and shift my focus, I thought today about how I could bring the shift in my life to think about more things that are SO GOOD in my life.
Even more than I do now. I even teach my clients and students do to this and I feel like I want more for us.
So what can we do?
Today, I want us not to just think and be provocative about what I am sharing here today. I want you to run through an exercise I JUST DID before I sat down to write to you today.
This is super simple! And you’re probably familiar with this kind of exercise already. So here we go! (Stop rolling your eyes…) :p
Take out a piece of paper and draw a line down the middle of it from the top down to the bottom.
On the left side title it “What I think is wrong.” On the right side title it “What I KNOW is right.”
Start with the left side and list all the things in your life that you think is wrong or that you think needs fixing. (I bet you can write this one quickly! I know I could… haha!)
Then on the right, make a list and think about what is right in your world. Here are some examples for you:
- I have a roof over my head
- I have a car to drive that gets me where I need to be
- I have friends that care about me and love me
- There many choices of food that I can eat
- The taste of the foods you eat
- The beauty of nature
- The advancement of technology and our EASY access to it
- Your massage therapist, acupuncturist, chiropractor, doctor, therapist, life coach, nail tech, aesthetician, beautician…
- The taste of hot/iced tea
- The animals that happily walk down the street with their parents
- The vibrant colors of the building and trees around you
- The forces of nature and the weather it brings
- The comfy pillows and blankets you sleep on at night
- The stillness of the nights
- The brightness of the sun
- The magic of Love
- Your job, your family, your children etc, etc, etc, etc…
Okay, okay! I know some of this sounds lofty, new age-y ,and you may not relate to all these things I just listed. But the truth is THESE THINGS EXIST in life! They are there, and they are attainable and easily experienced.
But I think you get my point. And you also might have a list of the wrong stuff that could be little longer that right stuff.
My point is that even though there is a handful of things going on in your life that aren’t exactly the way you want them to be, there is at the very least, a list of things that are right.
A list of things that some people don’t have the luxury of experiencing. And we’ll have different rights and wrongs.
But what I’m trying to help you visualize and FEEL is that even though the bad stuff happens, we cannot deny there is good stuff that is happening in our lives RIGHT NOW.
It will take some effort because sometimes we can be trained early on to be SO focused on the wrong things, because there is this bizarre need to be perfect!
That only EVERYTHING in our lives HAS TO BE just right.
But this is not reality. What reality is, is balance. Or better yet, contrast.
You are always going to experience contrasting realities as you walk along in life. Which is why I don’t want you to hang out in denial.
But I believe that when we spend time focusing on one thing, that is what we are keeping active!
If you’re focused of making that next sale, THAT will be in your experience. If you are focused on Love and sharing it, THAT will be in your experience.
If you’re focused on your LACK of Love or anything that you don’t have, THAT will be in your experience.
If you’re focused on all the wrong things, that is what you will spend your time worrying about.
Shift to your thoughts to the right side of your list. If you really think about it, there are many things in your life right now that are “right”. Things that we sometimes overlook because we cannot stay present in our moments.
And you know moments can be so fleeting these days.
So why would you want to lose the opportunity to experience all the goodness and happiness you have been asking for, just to keep your eyes on everything that you think is wrong or can go wrong?
You know what’s wrong, but consider what is right. And dedicate that time to considering what is right more often.
Remember, pretty much everything that goes on outside of us is not in our control. But what is in our control is what we think about and what we choose to invite in our lives.
Those choices are up to you, my dear friend! And you can start to shift your life by taking a few moments to start your list now.
Now I know some of you didn’t make a list. (You cannot fool a teacher.) Haha! But even if you mentally take note of the things the wonderful and beautiful in your life and live a little bit more in those moments, the not so great stuff begins to lose it charge in your life.
And you’ll begin to have a new set of tools available to you to move freely and lovingly throughout your day. And really as you get used to it, throughout your life!
The power of this shift is totally in your hands!
And the bottom line here is: GRATITUDE! Gratitude means noticing all the “right” things in spite of the “wrong” things!
Take these moments for yourself now! Celebrate what ever is “right” in your life, no matter how little or how much of it you have… (Click to tweet)
So tell me, what was on your list? What was wrong? What was right? How can you dedicate more time to focusing on all the good things in your life? What do you think you life would look like if you lived on the right side of your paper vs. the left? Let me know if in the comments below!
All my Love,
Andrew “Drew” Parales is the Creator and Mentor/Coach of “i LOVE Liberation” specializing in Personal Growth and Fitness! He is also a vocational rehab educator for students with disabilities in transition & employment, and the school site program events coordinator/trainer. Connect with Drew at: www.iLOVEliberation.com and on Facebook: iLOVELiberation and Twitter: @iLOVEliberation